Pierre: ello. I am Pierre, le lumberjack! Unt I loveeee Crusty French Bread.

 

Announcer: yes, you heard it from Pierre the Lumberjack, folks! Crusty French Bread is good. He’s French for cryin’ out loud!

 

Pierre: unt it is so healthy for you, it should be called “I can’t believe it’s not bread!”

 

Announcer: actually, its not bread

 

Pierre: Vat!? Vat is this?

 

Announcer: its actually made out of soy! You’ll be amazed what soy can be made into these days! From cardboard to mustard to xylophones! And you can’t tell the difference!

 

Pierre: vat da hell!? This makes me mad!

 

(Pierre starts his chainsaw)

 

Pierre: can’t you see that soy tastes like ass!? Hot dogs shouldn’t taste like soy, nor chicken nuggets which are made of soy!

 

Announcer: don’t get mad at me! Get mad at SoyCo! They made all that tasteless crap that makes you wanna barf!

 

Pierre: grrarrrh!

 

(Pierre waves his chainsaw in the air)

 

Pierre: dieee, SoyCo!

 

(Pierre stops waving his chainsaw, then takes a big bite out of the Crusty French Bread)

 

Pierre: now that I know its soy, you can obviously taste it! What a piece of shit!

 

Announcer: yes you can, Pierre, yes you can

 

Pierre: I can also taste your MOM in it

 

Announcer: what the hell? You shithead!

 

(Pierre and Announcer bitchslap fight)

(end)