Rachel has just written a book called Heil in the Freaky Jugs.  The main character in this lousy story is a hairy genius named Snasama who has just been elected president.  She must decide whether to spend money on making idiotic bombs, sending people to the planet Fudge-a-Mudga or building crayons to accommodate the growing population.  The author creates many stupid moments, and you will find yourself on the edge of your taco late at night because you cannot stop pissing this book.

Rachel turns out to be the greatest president in the last century and leads the people to peace and stupidity.  This book is written fast and should be nominated for a The Gallon of Piss Award.