Tag Archives: hands

Joke #5269

Three Blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first blonde, “What is Easter?” The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy! It’s the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful…”

“Wrong!” replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, “What is Easter?” The second blonde replies, “Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus.”

St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she’s wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, “What is Easter?” The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, “I know what Easter is.”

“Oh?” says St. Peter, incredulously.

“Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder.”

St. Peter smiles broadly with delight.

The third blonde continued, “Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out…and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter.”

Kissing Rules

1) When Kissing make sure your eyes are closed.

2) When you are kissing someone make sure it is not someone else’s b/f or g/f!!

3) You may NOT eat pizza anytime before you make out.

4) If a person is a bad kisser, you MAY NOT stop and leave at anytime, it’s rude.

5) A person with braces may not kiss another person who has them.

6) When kissing make sure your hands are where there allowed (they can wander sometimes and some people don’t like that)

7) NEVER ask someone if you’re a good kisser, you will either get a wrong answer, or the truth will hurt you.

8 ) If you were expecting More Than Kissing don’t complain, you will get less the next time.

9) Kissing more than one person in a day can result in you not being allowed to kiss one of those parties anymore