Holmes:
ok basically this started with a friend online telling me she got a random IM from someone who asked her for help on a t.v. show. I told her to tell the guy who needed help my screen name…and so, here we are!!!!!!!
———
Sprivenx: hi
Sprivenx: somone said u can help me
Holmes: sure i’ll help, i’m the most helpful guy you’ll ever meet
Sprivenx: Invader Zim is going off the air and i need help so u can put it back on the air or somthing!
Holmes: ok
Holmes: i can do that
Sprivenx: how?
Sprivenx: Arts and Entertainment – Protest Invader Zim
Holmes: i have….lets say….connections
Sprivenx: asl
Holmes: 43/m/Arizona
Sprivenx: can u do that?
Holmes: my connections are universal…i’m a very…well known person
Holmes: in the secret respect
Sprivenx: Yaaay!
Sprivenx: so how can u put it back on the air?
Holmes: when i tell someone to jump, they ask “how high”
Holmes: well i’ll have my people go and meet the people of invader zim
Sprivenx: They were gonna make more episodes of IZ
Holmes: this conversation will involve the use of bloody knuckles and threats…
Sprivenx: But nick said No:(
Holmes: thats terrible
Sprivenx: that show made me who i am today!
Holmes: invader zim is almost like a classic
Sprivenx: you have to help me!
Holmes: wow
Holmes: really?
Sprivenx: yes!!
Sprivenx: [ grabs holems by the cloak and falls ]: plz help me and my friends!
Sprivenx: holms*
Sprivenx: holmes*
Holmes: some people would call you a looser or a stupid ass, but not me…i call you a hero
Sprivenx: stupid ass?
Sprivenx: why the hell why?
Holmes: i don’t know
Holmes: people are wierd todat
Holmes: today*
Sprivenx: i know
Holmes: i mean some people pretend that they are someone like me, big and important, over the internet…can you believe that
Holmes: anyways were jumping off topic
Sprivenx: so how long would this process take?
Holmes: oh not long, i mean if you threaten to cut off someone’s…”jewels” they tend to jump 10 feet higher, run 10 mph faster and do things 10 times better
Sprivenx: lol
Sprivenx: wow
Holmes: yeah
Holmes: trust me
Holmes: i would know
Holmes: but, in return you must do a favor for me when i call upon you again
Sprivenx: waht?
Holmes: nevermind
Holmes: when the time comes, we will discuss it
Sprivenx: Just tell me!
Holmes: well, in todays common world, when one does one a favor, they usually do a favor in return, if you understand my kabowlee’s
Sprivenx: like….waht?
Holmes: don’t worry about the word kabowlee’s, it’s just a fancy word us people use to sound big anfd important
Holmes: well, right now a favor i plan on asking is non-existant, that is why i will discuss it with you at a later time
Sprivenx: Ok…?
Holmes: i may be using words you do not understand yet
Holmes: so i will put it plain and simple
Sprivenx: im only 12
Holmes: oh
Holmes: i honestly couldn’t tell
Holmes: you sound so mature for your age
Sprivenx: i do?
Holmes: you maybe be 12 on the outside, but your brain tells me you have the intelligence of a 20 year old
Sprivenx: im usually like this when somthing like this happens
Holmes: i can understand your pain…invader zim is just…so….wghats the word you yougin’s use? “radical”?
Sprivenx: Huh?
Holmes: nevermind
Sprivenx: i never say “Radical”
Holmes: oh
Sprivenx: thats retarded
Holmes: i was informed…i mean told…that “radical” was the word of the day for the cool people…my mistake
Sprivenx: kinda
Sprivenx: but not fer me
Holmes: oh it’s ok, you don’t have to be cool if you don’t want to…kids fail to realize that being cool is a decision
Sprivenx: im not that kinda “Cool”
Holmes: ahh i see…
Holmes: when i was young i was considered cool
Sprivenx: so what r u gonna do now?
Holmes: well i’m going to call my…”family” member Bubba “Wanker” Jones and he will call Rex “Massacre” Mahoney and he will call Johnny “Hooligan” Hooligan and they will mastricate the ferdidions at the production center when they produce “Invader Zim”
Holmes: in simple terms
Holmes: we will fix the problem
Sprivenx: kewl
Sprivenx: so waht do u want from me?
Sprivenx: just tell me
Holmes: I don’t know yet, sonny
Sprivenx: your freakin me out here
Sprivenx: i dont know u
Holmes: listen kid, relax
Holmes: are you relaxed?
Holmes: RELAX!!!!!
Sprivenx: no not really
Sprivenx: sheesh calm down
Holmes: I’M ALWAYS CALM!!!!!!!
Sprivenx: it sure doesnt look it
Holmes: oh silly me i left the caps on
Holmes: you know cap lock
Sprivenx: YES
Sprivenx: I THINK SO
Sprivenx: i dunno maybe i can
Holmes: hey…don’t forget who your talking to…don’t EVER yell at me!
Sprivenx: i wasnt yelling
Holmes: oh
Sprivenx: SEE?
Holmes: i see
Holmes: i see you writing see
Sprivenx: IF I WERE YELLING I WOULD HAVE EXCLAMATION PTS
Sprivenx: but i dont
Holmes: oh an important listen in the typing science
Holmes: lesson*
Holmes: anyways
Holmes: I will contact you in due time to let you know the progress of this action
Holmes: in short terms
Holmes: bye, i’ll talk to you later
Sprivenx: bye
Holmes: sily me, we never say bye in our organization, we say kilimop, it’s a word used to say see you later
Holmes: so KILIMOP!
Sprivenx: Ok?
Sprivenx: Kilimop
Holmes: kilimop
Sprivenx: whatever that is
Holmes: listen kid i already told you, don’t make me repeat myself
Holmes: so kilimop
Sprivenx: ok….
Sprivenx: kilimop