Did you hear about the girl who kissed so many sailors that her lips move in and out with the tide?
Category Archives: (C) Misogyny Jokes
Joke #12060
They should draft women and make them offensive specialists. Just think how much they know about charging things.
Joke #12059
Did you hear about the woman who joined the Army rather than the Navy because she looked better in green than in blue?
Joke #12048
SERGEANT: “What can I do for you, Skiles?”
PVT. SKILES: “I was wondering if I can take a tank home tonight. I’m teaching my wife to drive.”
Joke #12041
SISTER: “Tell me the truth, do boys like talkative girls as well as they like the other kind?”
BROTHER: “What other kind?”
Joke #12034
When I die, I’m going to leave my ex-wife everything I have. And all those bills will fix her wagon once and for all.
Joke #12029
My wife’s feet are killing me. They keep taking her to department store sales.
Joke #12021
I’m not on speaking terms with my mother-in-law, and I wish she’d follow my example.
Joke #12020
I wouldn’t object to my wife having the last word. But wouldn’t you think she’d get to it after fifteen years?
Joke #12019
My wife gives me twenty-four-hour lip service. Her mouth is never closed.
Joke #11940
Did you hear about the woman who got her head stuck in the washing machine and ended up brainwashed?
Joke #11930
WOMAN: “Why did God create Adam first?”
MAN: “To give him a chance to say something.”
Joke #11926
WOMAN: “Joe is a considerate husband. he takes his wife out to eat almost every night.”
MAN: “Considerate? Baloney! Joe’s wife is the world’s worst cook.”
Joke #9287: The Play’s the Sting
Matt’s dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got one.
Matt enthusiastically announced that he had. “I play a man who’s been married for twenty years.”
“That’s great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they’ll be giving you a speaking part.”
Joke #9286: Shirley You Can’t Be Serious
“That wife of mine is a liar,” said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him at the bar.
“How do you know?” the friend asked.
“She didn’t come home last night, and when I asked her where she’d been, she said that she had spent the night with her sister, Shirley. And I know that’s a lie because I spent the night with her sister, Shirley.”