This one was filled in by davepoobond:

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It will be unlawful to own a pervert or carry a concealed pervert without a pervert license. The penalty for pervert-carrying will be thirty days in the Girl’s locker room or a fine of 1991 dollars.  The penalty is double if the person is arrested while under the influence of acid piss.

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I don’t know who filled in this one:

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It will be unlawful to own a chair or carry a concealed chair without a chair liscense.  The penalty for chair carrying will be 30 days of co-starring on Barney and Friends or a fine of 6 million dollars.  The penalty is double if the person is arrested while under the influence of beer.