Municipal Poopoo

Yes, Poopoo is my name…Municipal Poopoo. My mom abandoned me when I was just a turd. I never saw my dad, but I blame him for flushing me down the toilet.

I’m a detective. My house, my office, is a sespool. I get new cases everytime, y’see, when “they” flush them down, down into my office.

The bacteria in the sespool are my security system. When a bad turd comes around, they eat’m up right away.

But when there is a turd with a good case, I take it up personally. Like once when this old geezer came along and said, “Yo llevo un el gato en mi pantalones” I knew who he was. He was the old Spanish turd from a Spanish guy pooping on “their” toilet.

He said, “I need you to find out who pooped me out.” So, I helped the old 15 year-old geezer, by scraping the old poo-skin-layer off of him, he then tossed his cane and ran around the sespool, screaming, “I’m reborn!” …Then he broke in half and died. It was a grousome sight.

I wanted to know what happened to the old geezer, after, all I did have to scrape his hairy poo-skin off…

I went down to the bar, and asked around if anybody knew him. One guy did. It was the bartender. He said he’d talk, only if I got a pee from the Septic Tank, so I gave him 15 poo-coins and he gave me a jug of pee. It had a nice smell, and it had a layer of foam on it, a true sign it came straight from the septic tank.

“Well, you gonna tell me anything?” I said after a sip of pee. The bartender rolled around to me and said, “sure. the old geezer just drank some pee and said he was going to revitalize his body and take a poo-bath.” “hmm…” I thought to myself, “That old geezer should have lived another 5 years…”

It was then, I remembered seeing a sparkle as the old geezar split in half. Then it came to me. He was assassinated! I recognized the sparkle as a shiny tooth. The assassin must have been cleaning it for weeks!

I looked around, looking for any suspicious looking Poos around. That’s when I saw a guy with a tooth-machete. It glimmered in the light. Just as I made my move, he sliced another piece of poo while he was running away from me. Poor soul.

Once he got out of the bar, I shot him 5 times with my Poo-ray gun. Then he was eaten by the bacteria.

Well, that was the best adventure I ever had. All in a days work, of course.

Bye

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