Quote #26042

For context of this quote, this dating profile has about ten pictures of a girl in her progression from going “fit to fat.”

“Im currently taking part in a paid study for a company based in the United States. they’re testing a new food additive that creates addiction in whatever its placed in. they ship me specially made food with this additive and im supposed to eat it whenever I crave it and until im satisfied. So safe to say ive put on a few since I started 😛 I know its odd so if you wanna know more just ask!

– excerpt from a girl’s dating profile

 

I Am Famous

Wow, the real Sofia Vergara sent little ol’ ME a friend request on Facebook!  She’ll need more than a sultry Facebook photo and lack of anything substantive on the profile to get me to add her, though.  Keep losing with your hot pictures Sofia, maybe next time.

 

Quote #24596

My self-summary

“im not looking for a relationship or anything like that so any message asking me to be your girlfriend will get trashed. also please dont try and talk with me not here to converse just here to sell. sorry
im here to fulfill a fetish a lot of men have and thats buying used panties. you heard right. im selling my dirty panties to anyone who is interested.
please dont message me asking for sex and/or friendship. i am only looking to sell.
my delicious panties are $40 each and i do give discounts to clients who buy a few pairs so message me ONLY if you’re interested.
we can either meet up or i can mail them to you. sorry i dont drive to anyone that lives outside of LA.”

What I’m doing with my life

“selling my delicious panties”

I spend a lot of time thinking about

“all the men that love my panties”

On a typical Friday night I am

“selling panties”

The most private thing I’m willing to admit

“it turns me on when guys buy my panties”

You should message me if

“you want a pair of my used panties”

 

– from a girl’s dating profile