What To Do About Mrs. Larkin: Operation Dump the Chump

Scene 1: Discussion

Mr. Rogers: That Mrs. Larkin, she’s a weird one…

Officer Squank: I really think that Mrs. Larkin is very, very, very, very, very, veerrryy “strange”

Officer Fuzzy: Yes, she’s veeerrryyy weird

Mr. Rogers: Maybe you should go do something about it

Officer Squank: NAAAH!

Officer Fuzzy: She used to be not so weird

Officer Squank: Yep…

Mr. Rogers: I liked her…

Officer Fuzzy: WHAT?!

Mr. Rogers: Uhh, sorry. Never mind…

Officer Fuzzy: Her husband, Roger, died in a car accident. A stupid tree fell on him. He shoulda seen it coming! You gotta be an idiot to not see a tree falling down and just go on like a regular day. Ever since that she has been weird. Oh well…

Mr. Rogers: Quack! …Excuse me!

Officer Squank: She has a messy garden

Officer Fuzzy: Garden? What garden? I thought that was a jungle….oh uh….yes, she does, I guess…I wonder if there are any mangos in there….mmm mangos…..

Mr. Rogers: I hate gardens……yes

Officer Fuzzy: She’s a nut, now. A nut that stays in a stupid jung….er garden the whole day!

Mr. Rogers: I like asparagus…yes

Officer Squank: Oh…

Mr. Rogers: Wanna know….a secret….yes

Officer Squank: Sure…fine….whatever

Mr. Rogers: I’m her husband…yes

(Officer Squank gasps)

Scene 2: The Truth Unvealed

Mr. Rogers: She was annoying…yes

Officer Fuzzy: I thought you were dead!

Mr. Rogers: Well…no…I actually cut down the tree, so that the tree could fall down on her….but I just happen to be in the car at the wrong time…..I tried to dump the chump, they call “my wife”….yes

Officer Squank: I thought you were actually happy being with the nut

Mr. Rogers: Well, I was, when she was actually active, but when she got to be an old hag, I had to “dump the chump.” I could get some other fresh meat…or, to you, girls….yes

Officer Squank: You suck

Mr. Rogers: No, I don’t. I want to fly! Fly, fly, fly, fly, FLY!!!

(Mr. Rogers goes over and jumps off a cliff)

Officer Squank: Well, I guess he’s dead now….

Officer Fuzzy: Yeah, I guess

Officer Squank: Want some donuts? Maybe we can hold up a donut shops with our guns

(Officer Squank holds his gun up and starts laughing)

Officer Squank: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!

(end)

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