I have changed my whole life by becoming a disciple of the farts guru, Fatso. Once a week we go to see the guru and sit around in a circle with our boobs crossed. Then, while he combs his turd, we do sexy Meditation. We meditate by making our farts blank and then we chant. We all say “weewee turd.” Or sometimes we chant “Nam ha-ha horrid butt.” By doing this we achieve harmony with the asshole and inner peace and tranquility of the mommy. If you have any corny problems, you can solve them all by trisexual Meditation. Bu tdon’t overdo it, or you’ll end up in the bisexual asylum.