Dream #25786

I had a dream about a party at my parent’s house with tons of random “family” members, even dead ones.

Melissa Joan Hart was there and she knew me and waved.  A pair of twin brothers named Eddie and Edik I hadn’t met before were also there.

There was some sort of evaluation sheet that allowed me to jump back and forth to see their degradation in smartness or something and if they changed over time, it would give a status about them.

In the family room, I wanted wine but my mom would keep pouring watered-down sparkling water and then pour some wine afterwards, despite not wanting that.  I finally took the wine myself and then left to go to another room.

In the other room was a room full of young hipster-type people.  I was done with my “family” and decided to go into the next room with those people.  They were all huddled around the couch playing some board game, and there was about 15 to 20 of them and not all of them were playing.  They all looked at me but didn’t know who I was.  I said “Hi, my name is Dave and I’m an alcoholic” as a joke, but they thought I was serious and asked if I was an alcoholic.

I remember something about “The Mayor” (not a real person) showing up at the party and then all of a sudden there were gun shots or something like that, someone was trying to kill him or me, I don’t know.  I woke up at that point.

 

Dream #25785

The dream starts with me launching two ICBMs while on the freeway.  Unsure where they went, but they didn’t explode.  I got arrested but was taken to a school convention instead of a jail.  I left overnight, then woke up and was arrested again outside the market place I was dropped off at.  I then called elmoisfurry to warn him about the whole situation since he was supposedly there too.

Then I woke up.

 

Squacklecast Episode 36 – “Toys R Us That’s Why We R Bankrupt”

This entry is part 36 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

This episode has it all!

Ass!

Titties!

Porn parody crossovers!

MORE STAR WARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  And Toys R Us store-visiting experiences!!!

We talk about the general concept of shared universes and crossovers.  There’s a general lack of crossovers nowadays, and I think the idea that Alien, Blade Runner, and Soldier all being in the same universe is a dandy one.  Thanks Ridley Scott!

The new Jersey Shore reunion is a topic of discussion.

And there’s a Star Wars: The Last Jedi porn parody.  It’s probably better than The Last Jedi.

Looks like they got rid of Finn completely — so it’s actually just the director’s cut of The Last Jedi.

See you next bankruptcy!

 

Squacklecast Episode 35 – “Cambridge Squacklytica”

This entry is part 35 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

Wow, another podcast in the same year as another one?!?

We talk about what we are going to talk about. Unfortunately we have some recording issues, with dropping out and connections I guess, so sorry for that.

Pacific Rim Uprising is what we discuss at the beginning since it is out this weekend.  We talk about reviews and how it compares to transformers. then we talk about transformers and actors who appear in this sort of movie.

We then go into about Comedians becoming dramatic actors and dramatic actors who take on comedic roles, such as Chris Hemsworth in Thor: Ragnarok.

We talk about having no time to watch shows. Atlanta, Black Mirror is discussed. Then we talk about Eddie Murphy, which leads into Smash Mouth tour dates and then a discussion on fast food.

Somebody once told me the world listens to Squacklecast.

I think they were lying.

We talk about the Facebook data breach and other miscellaneous things.

I’M GOING TO GO SEE PACIFIC RIM UPRISING NOW, EVERYONE.

 

Squacklecast Episode 34 – “Your Post-Oscars Oscars 2018 Trailers Guide”

This entry is part 34 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

Hi there!  We have a podcast?

Oh, right we do… well get ready for the POST-OSCARS OSCARS 2018 TRAILERS GUIDE!!!  WITH THE SQUACKLECAST!!!

This is Peak Squacklecast right here folks.  Or is it “Pique?”

We talk about The Oscars, and how we would improve it.  A pear is also involved at multiple times.  We talk about the movies we did and didn’t see during The Oscars.  There are other things too, I guess.  I sort of forgot at this point.

We also do a quick recap on Black Panther, our likes and dislikes.  I NEVER FREEZE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Something I forgot to mention in our mini-recap about Black Panther — I would have liked more “panther” type kinetic releases (like swiping and jumping or whatever) rather than a big kinetic cloud coming out of a suit.

We also recommit to doing a Squacklecast more often so that our listeners out there can get more content!  Or maybe we didn’t recommit.

Welp, see you next time!

 

WoW Chat #25685

Note: “DBM” is a popular add-on in the game that most people have and most people know about.  It helps with raids and has other quality of life options for the game in general.

Cloned: Thanks blizz, for forcing me to watch a cutscene ive seen 8 times,  and not letting me ESC out, and missingi my 40 min queue pop. Fuck you Xera

davepoobond: someone doesnt have DBM…

Cloned: whats that

Myuuse: lol

Stormclaw: …

Cailirath: delete now bro

Myuuse: Did you just join WoW?

Cailirath: I think the real question is why is a dk not tank queing instead of wasting a plate class

Phatgrillz: yo why are sky golems so expensive now?

Cloned: oh sorry, im not some mega nerd. that modified my WoW Ui, to look like some spaceship taking off

Cailirath: idk lol the mats are still cheap as ever

davepoobond: “mega nerd”

davepoobond: you’re just a dumby instead.  guess thats worse

Cailirath: want some ointment for that burn?

Cloned: oh sorry, i dont make my WoW gtaming experience, like im working for NASA.. sorry im one of those normal ppl that understand this is just a game

davepoobond: literally no one has the issue you are having because we are smart enough to have a required add-on

Myuuse: DBM is a simple mod that fixes dumb shit and assists during dungeon and raid fights

Myuuse: it doesn’t overhaul the UI or anything like that

davepoobond: it has nothing to do with making the game look like a spaceship

davepoobond: what a weird analogy

Myuuse: Don’t talk shit when you very clearly don’t know what you’re talking about

 

Myuuse: You’re just making yourself seem like even more of an idiot than your initial comment made you seem

Cloned: oH sorry, i dont bust out graphing calculators, and spreadsheets to determine how much damage i can potentially do

davepoobond: no one does that bro

(In Guild Chat) Dusk: he starts every sentence with OH SORRY

Cailirath: normal people have dbm

Stormclaw: It’s a good thing he isn’t in a spaceship or there’d be another challenger incident

Myuuse: DBM’s purpose is to make sure you don’t stand in fire

davepoobond: OH SORRY I DONT USE LIGHT TO SEE THINGS IN FRONT OF ME

Cailirath: Im guessing he does

Myuuse: He absolutely does

Cailirath: hes probably that dps standing there blowing cds on trash pulls

davepoobond: I ALSO DONT USE UNCLASPED BRAS OR BOTTLES OF WINES

Cloned: oh sorry i dont modify my WoW UI like some sociopath, so that it looks like a spaceship taking off… u know to some people, this is just a game

Cloned: sorry i dont bust out graphing calculators and spreadsheets to determine my DPS acceleration

Mightydwarf: How to spot a shitter

Cloned: yeah im shit, because i play WoW for fun… not like some mega nerd, that thinks WoW is like working at NASA, when they install 10 million addons

davepoobond: you are an anti-science cretin.  what is wrong with NASA

Cloned: there is a reason there is a stigma against WoW players, and its from sociopaths like him  that Call everyone shit, if they didnt modify their UI to determine complex equations about DPS

Cloned: and then he tells the casual players to Delete and walk away from the computer…. THe irony is that he needs that more than anyone

Kynsae: No, im pretty sure the stigma is that people will choose raids over real life, play all the time, and generally talk nerdy

Whicket: yo whats an addo

Cloned: its something, that you install when you lack skill

Whicket: so the fact that i install an addon to mash my bags together or see my dps means i lack skill?

Whicket: well fuck me silly im uninstalling

Tormentous: once you uninstall them your skill will increase like crazy

davepoobond: why do you hate NASA

 

I Am Famous

Wow, the real Sofia Vergara sent little ol’ ME a friend request on Facebook!  She’ll need more than a sultry Facebook photo and lack of anything substantive on the profile to get me to add her, though.  Keep losing with your hot pictures Sofia, maybe next time.

 

Ridiculous Spam Mail #25669

Subj:    HI DAVE!!!!

Date:   12/22/00 8:58:00 PM Pacific Standard Time

From: maeve2000

To: davepoobond

Hey Dave, how are you doing? I hope well. My name is Maeve and I was just checking out your profile on yahoo, so I thought I’d write. Well let me tell you a little about myself. I am 24 years old and have a job in the construction industry, but I don’t do much hard labor, I am an on site assistant manager that supervises different developments around the country.

Anyway I am always travelling because my boss likes to keep me out on the jobs instead of in the office since I am young and flexable with my time. I am sending you this message because I will be working on various projects throughout California for the next 8-10 weeks depending on the time it takes to get these project’s done. I can tell you that I am about 5’7 and single with a rather attractive body I think.  It would really be nice to meet a person here that could show me around the town because I am totally lost and really don’t do much with my time when I am not working.  I really don’t need to do anything that special to have a good time out.  I can have fun just going out and having a few beers or watching a movie. Plus it is always nice to get out of the hotel I am staying at near the airport and see what different towns and people have to offer.

Well I hope you don’t get the wrong impression about me, I am not looking for a serious relationship right now,  but sometimes the company of a man is needed from time to time and I am not totally close minded to having some sexual fun. Don’t think that is all I am about because I am a clean woman with morals it is just that I am human like everyone else, and I am going to have some fun while I am young and single.

Last but not least to say, I have just a few pics of myself that a girlfriend took of me and I think they look great. If you want I can send them to you so you can get an idea of what I look like. Hope to hear from you soon.!!

CAN’T WAIT TO MEET!!   MAEVE

 

Quote #25667: A note to davepoobond

“Davepoobond – stepdadpoobond, me + mompoobond are at the movies.  We went at 5:10 + should be back well u no!  Dont get mad because we were at the theatre getting the tickets 4 tomorrow + decided 2 go + see 1 today….we didn’t want to buy a ticket, + find out u cant come.  halk later!

– everyone”

– sisterpoobond

 

Squacklecast Episode 33 – “Star Wars: The Last Shit I Give”

This entry is part 33 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

This episode has it all!

Self-reflection!

Net Neutrality!

Justice League!

Star Wars: The Last Jedi!

Fuck my life!!  I thought this year was supposed to have good movies!  Instead we just got fuuuuuuuucked.  Fuck you Ajit Pai!  Fuck you Rian Johnson!

Go watch Blade Runner 2049.  It was the only one worth watching this year.

 

Squacklecast Episode 32 – “‘Soft’ Reboot”

This entry is part 32 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

Another year has passed, and for some reason we finally remembered to do a Squacklecast!

Lots of things have changed, and we talk mostly about Wonder Woman, Batman, and Twin Peaks.

 

We talk about MTV, Ryan Seacrest’s dildos, how Carson Daly will share a burrito with you, and a 15 minute long awkward “ending” to this week’s podcast.

Since my old iMac finally was booted from having an up to date version of Skype, I had to record on my new computer with a new configuration.  We might sound a little different than usual, but hopefully it isn’t bad.  It is easier to set up though, so we may once again be able to do these more often.

See ya next time!

 

WoW Chat #25066: davepoobond -> Tito

Another player kills me, then kills me again.  He then adds me as a friend on some alternate account.

davepoobond: whos this

Tito: u retarded?

davepoobond: ?

Tito: the dk wrecking you

davepoobond: who is that

Tito: look at your combat log, or your screen for that matter. im the reason youre dead

Tito: jesus, you are retarded

davepoobond: who

Tito: nevermind. enjoy being camped. youre incapable of talking

davepoobond: idk who u r

Tito: because youre being stupid

davepoobond: how

davepoobond: make sure to vote republican

davepoobond: hey

davepoobond: how was your day

davepoobond: hellooooooooooooooo

davepoobond: do you like captain america

davepoobond: i just saw it today

Tito: pretending youre 13 isnt cute.

davepoobond: what do you want to talk about then

Tito: nothing, added you to see what zone youre in to keep killing you

davepoobond: did i kill your quest mob or something

Tito: nope, i killed you then you tried to jump me and i killed you again cause. youre garbage

Tito: and youre clearly already aware of that

Tito: hence the game youre playing where you act stupid

Tito: sad

Tito: enjoy losing

davepoobond: cant wait to see your emails leaked on wikileaks

Tito: its sad youre in your 20s and act 13

Tito: think about that

He unfriends me.  A couple minutes later he comes back and kills me.

 

WoW Chat #24869: Decota -> davepoobond

I’m in a dungeon with this guy; I’m the healer.  He kept dying a lot.  Eventually I get a trinket at the end of the run…

Decota: game just dosent get i need purple shit

davepoobond: weed?

Decota: nah got that

Decota: trad ya

Decota: for the trink

davepoobond: trade what

Decota:   [Obelisk of the Void]

davepoobond: for a ring i dont need?

davepoobond: nty

Decota: ok buddy

Decota: you shuld learn to heal better

davepoobond: maybe dont afk

Decota: lol

Decota: dam 2.5mil crit

Decota: god dam it get your thumb out of your ass

davepoobond: you should learn to live better, mage

Decota: lol

Decota: fuck you

Decota: learn to heal

davepoobond: my trink is not yours

davepoobond: you are not entitled to it

Decota: you need that and more

davepoobond: get your head out of your ass

Decota: lol

Decota: let the tank die

Decota: with 4mil lol

davepoobond: you let your mom die

Decota: see ya dum as

 

Squacklecast Episode 31 – “The Beach Sucks”

This entry is part 31 of 36 in the series The Squacklecast

Wow its been like 3 or 4 months since the last one?  Well, here’s another SQUACKLECAST.

We talk about how much I hate having “fun” on the 4th of July weekend.

X-Men Apocalypse and Warcraft are the main topics otherwise.

Pixar’s Finding Dory is out, we haven’t seen it, but we talk about how hard it is for us to say which Pixar movies we actually really like for some reason.  Who actually asked for a sequel to Finding Nemo anyway?

Clifford the Big Red Dog is also coming to the big screen.

Michael Bay and Roland Emmerich come up.  We also talk about their careers.

We then talk about this Uno card game for the PS1, with this amazing opening movie.

 

I’m probably missing some things.  ANYWAY!  See ya next time!

 

WoW Chat #24788

In Trade Chat…

Moneypennie: ** Miss Moneypenny’s Summer’s End Sale!  Save Big on all transmog, profession recipes, pets and more… 50-75% off normal prices… thousands of items to choose from … this weekend only. **

davepoobond: summer is just beginning

Moneypennie:  ** Miss Moneypenny’s Summer Clearance Sale!  Save Big on all transmog, profession recipes, pets and more… 50-75% off normal prices… thousands of items to choose from … this weekend only. **

Moneypennie: better? for you southies

davepoobond: summer clearances only happen at the end of winter

Moneypennie: why can i not please you?!

davepoobond: you’re not using enough tongue

Moneypennie: ick! ew! gross!

davepoobond: …in-cheek!!!