Inflation must be hurting everybody. Last week I cashed my income tax refund and the check bounced.
Inflation has reduced my household to a two-party system: a New Year’s Eve Party and a Christmas Party.
Inflation hasn’t ruined everything. A dime can still be used as a screwdriver.
With food prices and inflation sky high, I don’t know which is emptier — my wallet or my refrigerator.
American money is really inflated. Yesterday I opened my wallet and watched helplessly as a twenty-dollar bill floated off into the sky.
With inflation, wars and high prices, it’s not easy being a young American, because you’re not old enough to remember the good old days.
How bad is inflation? …Yesterday when I got paid, all of my bills were folded into paper airplanes.
Now the government is thinking of minting coins to take the place of paper bills. The idea is that by making the dollars heavier, inflation won’t be able to soar as easily.
Inflation is worse than I thought. Last week I beat a one-armed bandit in Las Vegas, and the slot machine paid me off in I.O.U.’s.
The United States Mint just issued a statement saying they’d like to replace one-dollar bills with two-dollar bills. Heck! Inflation did that a long time ago.
A recent report stated that due to inflation, our bodies, which used to be worth only 98 cents, are now worth $5.60. Isn’t it depressing to know that a good sirloin steak is worth more than you are!
And even more depressing, while people are only worth five dollars and sixty cents, pet turtles cost ten bucks!
With inflation the way it is, the cost of operating a shopping cart in a supermarket is now about $50.00 per aisle.
“I’m glad to see that inflation hasn’t affected our local Congressman.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’s still a two-bit politician.”
Inflation has increased life expectancy. People live longer these days because funerals cost so much.
Inflation has turned me into an early riser. To make extra cash, I got a paper route.