Tag Archives: girl

Quote #22598

“hi im becca…IM ****ING AWESOME!!!! I have been in a relationship now for a little over a year and I wouldn’t change it for the world… This man showed me what it is like to live again. He showed me how to love and trust again any I didn’t think that it was possible… I have the best man and boyfriend that I could ever imagine or ask for… I love him with all my heart! If you want to be friends that’s cool with me but anything more then that I’d have to tell you to not even try!!! You wont get anywhere and you can really just get lost!!! I love my baby and no one is Gunna take me from him or take that away from me…”

– from a girl’s dating profile

Quote #22597

“Okay, look. I just left someone who was trying to pressure me into having sex, the unconventional way. (Oh, we’ll get married, this and that, but I HAVE to have sex, can’t wait, etc etc) and I am NOT HAVING IT. If you’re trying to get in my pants, and I’m not saying you are, but if it so happens you are, you’re not getting any. I’m sorry. I’m holding out for a long time, so date one of these other women. I don’t judge them, and I don’t believe I’m better than them. In fact, I used to be in the same boat as many of them. As I’ve gotten older, things have changed. Maybe it’ll just be me for the rest of my life, but it certainly won’t be me and random strangers, or soon-to-be strangers after a few dates of no nooky.”

– from a girl’s dating(?) profile

#22575: Mrs. Whooty -> davepoobond

Mrs. Whooty: Yoyo

davepoobond: who be this

Mrs. Whooty: Hello there.. My name is Mrs Whooty.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory 🙂

davepoobond: why did you im me

Mrs. Whooty: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?

davepoobond: Tajikistan

Mrs. Whooty: Can i ask you a quest?

davepoobond: do i get 1000 xp after

Mrs. Whooty: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what i am/have..Is that too much for you to handle?

davepoobond: do you like to drive a camaro or a tricycle

Mrs. Whooty: Do you know what a whooty is? Would you like to see me i’ll show you my Whooty….

davepoobond: loooool

Mrs. Whooty: lol Whooty is a White Girl with a BOOTY! i wanna show u mine…

davepoobond: looooool

davepoobond: loooool

davepoobond: loool

Mrs. Whooty: ok let me set up my camera for you honey..

Quote #22574: The Crazy Shirt Story

This entry is part 24 of 26 in the series The Retail Report

A girl came over to my register with two articles of clothing to purchase.  Before you ask, no she was not hot.  I was wearing a shirt, if that isn’t implied by this story already.

Girl: “Cool shirt!”

davepoobond: “Oh, thank you.”

::5 second pause::

Girl: “So, what’s the story behind the shirt?”

davepoobond: “Umm….”

::I took a couple seconds to think how I should respond to this ridiculously dumb question::

davepoboond: “I had a 10 dollar gift card to Kohl’s, I went there and I bought this shirt.”

– at davepoobond’s job