Tag Archives: GameMaker

Me a Monkey (PC) Review

Developer: Cybershark

  Me a Monkey (PC) (598.0 KiB, 1,045 hits)

Game by Cybershark, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

Never before in a game, do you have a bazooka thing that shoots spinning bananas that blow up ninja monkeys, piles of goo, stupid things you can’t shoot, and hover monkeys from a boat, until this game. This game takes you through lush scenery, like…umm…black…steps, and waterfalls and trees that you can’t climb (even though you’re a monkey)

Graphics:

Completely sub-par. I don’t even know what that means exactly, but its less than average.

Sound:

The annoying exploding sounds. The weird thing is, when you shoot, you hear an explosion, not when you actually have the thing explode…

Gameplay:

Normal…but there were times where I fell through the floor, and that was gay, because then I had to start over again. The only part that I actually kind of liked was the boat level thing…if you ever get past all the parts of the game you can fall through..

Crappiest Part:

How you fall through the floor sometimes for no reason. It seems you only fall if you shoot in specific places. And the legs of the monkey keep moving even though you’re not moving.

Overall Score:

It was an ok attempt, but it could have been done better.

4/10

  Me a Monkey (PC) (598.0 KiB, 1,045 hits)

Game by Cybershark, made with Game Maker.

Master of the Six Magics (PC) Review

Developer: Delta9 Games

  Master of the Six Magics (PC) (734.6 KiB, 1,050 hits)

Game by Delta9 Games, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

This is a semi-original kind of game, reminiscent of tetris and the matching part of memory without the memory thing

Graphics:

The graphics aren’t especially great, but they accomplish what they need to be, and its not like they’re an eyesore. Its easy to tell them apart, and I guess that’s kind of important for this game.

Sound:

There was a delightful one song soundtrack that I must buy.

Gameplay:

Point and drag. It was simple enough. The instructions are kind of confusing I think. Basically, you have to drag the squares into a straight line of 3 or more. The most possible is 6 but you’ll find yourself (or at least I did) trying to get the 3 in a rows instead of the more in a rows, because blocks keep falling down, and you need to get more space for them.

Crappiest Part:

While this is kind of a fun game, there isn’t much to it, like increasing difficulty levels or something like that.

Overall Score:

This is a mix of a couple things, and I think that it was good for the idea. There weren’t any annoying things that hindered playing, but this isn’t anything better than an average game.

7/10

  Master of the Six Magics (PC) (734.6 KiB, 1,050 hits)

Game by Delta9 Games, made with Game Maker.

Mark (PC) Review

Developer: Gamez Hell

  Mark (PC) (2.2 MiB, 1,099 hits)

Game by Gamez Hell, made with Game Maker.

There’s a lot of bad games made with Game Maker, but this game is not one of them. I’ve spent so many hours playing this game that my fingers and eyes have gone numb. Wait…am I reviewing Mark Platinum here? Well then let me rephrase what I’ve said thus far. This game IS one of them, and I hate it about a whole lot.

For one, the size of the screen is about 9 x 9, so you better get the magnifying glass when you’re ready to play. Also bring about eight bottles of Motrin also. The game begins with an introduction story so pathetic and misspelled that I wonder if the designer put any thought into the game. After playing the game for five more seconds, you will see that the answer to that is no.

Aliens have invaded Asia and are headed for Europe! So why the hell do I start off in a room with a backdrop of Egypt? Last time I checked, Egypt wasn’t in either Europe nor Asia….ok mister smarty man, whatever you say! Pressing right makes Mark move right..that’s all. The maker was too busy chugging anti-freeze and masturbating to Ateens videos to even make a walking animation of any sort. Pressing up will make Mark move up, again with no kind of animation. Video game characters sure do suck these days, all they every start out with is the ability to jump really fucking high and make enemies dissapear and make a weird sound when landed upon. After walking forward and trying to jump over enemies for a while you hit a flag and are transported to the end of the game. Ok maybe you don’t but a guy can dream can’t he? No? Well fuck you too.

The second level has ice or something, I don’t really remember. Anyway, there’s a gun the size of a mountain in which you can pick up if you walk into it. The gun then magically turns into a normal sized gun. When fired it shoots about eight hundred pool balls, TEH ENEMYS HAV NO CHANS.You have infinite lives but it doesn’t matter because the game blows infants for jawbreakers. And everytime you restart a level, the music repeats from the beginning. May I add that the music is like listening to a barn orgy involving your whole family and a group of very dirty pigs.

Graphics: -5

Sound: -6

Replayability: -9

Fun Factor: -10

Controls: 0

basically, a 1/10

SCREENSHOTS:

The giant pussy gun, this is the whole size of the screen.

  Mark (PC) (2.2 MiB, 1,099 hits)

Game by Gamez Hell, made with Game Maker.

Link’s Haunted House (PC) Review

Developer: Stenners

  Link's Haunted House (PC) (812.2 KiB, 1,077 hits)

Game by Stenners, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

okay…let’s see here. Ummm…You’re Link (hooray) and you’re in a haunted house (hooray) and….you have to get through a maze (hooray)…and you can’t go anywhere past the first turn! (booray) (that’s the word I just made up that is opposite to hooray)

Graphics:

the Link sprite is ripped off from somewhere, i’d bet. The door looks like a pecan and the ghost thing looks like a piece of purple shit that somehow got the balls to say “hey I’m a ghost and I’m going to fly around, and on top of walls while I’m at it”

Sound:

There’s a delightful version of Cypress Hill – Rock Superstar in MIDI format, that doesn’t place very well at all in this game.

Gameplay:

uhhh there’s no attacking, you just move….its not a good game, don’t get it.

Crappiest Part:

the part where everything is.

Overall Score:

You can’t even play this game, I have no idea what the point is, and its killing me that I can’t get through the pecan door so I can get to Nut World and bask in nuts of all types. 1/10 for crushing my dreams of a nut-filled world.

  Link's Haunted House (PC) (812.2 KiB, 1,077 hits)

Game by Stenners, made with Game Maker.

Kill the Dummies (PC) Review

Developer: PG Games

  Kill the Dummies (PC) (3.9 MiB, 1,088 hits)

Game by PG Games, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

This game is like a retarded dream, and it only gets worse from there…This is the description of the game it gives in the readme file: The object of the game is to kill all the dummies in three levels for so little time as possible. Game may contain some violence and blood, but just remember: Don’t do this in real-life! If you do, you are an idiot and don’t blame us when you’re in court! Moohahahaha *Grin*.

Now I would see this impossible to do, because we are not floating hands with claws coming out of them, nor are we a sword that is randomly put into the game.

Graphics:

They suck the hair right off my ass. The backgrounds are the only thing that look any good, and they’re the things that make the game so fucking big.

Sound:

I like the title screen music. This is probably the only thing that you would want to do with this game. Listen to the theme song, then close it, but if you know what it is, you should get the midi instead of this game. Well, the rest of the midis used in the game are alright too…

Gameplay:

The moving hand with claws coming out of it moves so badly, and when you attack, the hand goes to the other side ah who cares no ones gonna play this fucking game. Its really bad.

Crappiest part:

the programmer behind the game. There is no creativity in the game at all, except from the people that made the MIDIs in the first place.

Overall Score:

This game took me 20 minutes to download, and it only gave me 83 seconds of play. This is NOT worth the download, and it makes me wonder why the FUCK this is even 4 megs. I came to the conclusion that it was the backgrounds, and he used them as bitmaps…this game is horrible. 1/10.

  Kill the Dummies (PC) (3.9 MiB, 1,088 hits)

Game by PG Games, made with Game Maker.

Johnny (PC) Review

Developer: PG Games

  Johnny (PC) (7.1 MiB, 1,041 hits)

Game by PG Games, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

Going to the PG Games website is so perplexing to me, because there are so many horrible games that are so not worth downloading that I get the feeling that I must have them before they are gone forever, because no one downloads them. One of those fascinating games is….the oddly named Johnny. The name Johnny has nothing to do with anything in the game. There are no words in this game. Its funny, cause in the help file it says that the story was made by the guy that made the game, but low and behold there ain’t no fuckin story. I’m still in awe at the fact that this fucking game is 8 megs. What the fuck is with that, you might ask, for this game being so crappy just by one glance at the pictures? The mp3, is what it is. Its a fairly good techno song though, and that’s the only good thing about this game. I’m happy that I actually got this game, so I could get my hands on that succulent techno song that goes so not well with anything happening in the game.

Graphics:

First of all, everything about this game scares me. The Johnny guy has a smile that I originally thought was a beard, but i guess it was just the black background (which is also scary, because there’s nothing there, its just black.), and there’s naked purple aliens everywhere, throwing their shitflames, and these weird eye tower things, and these weird sack things that don’t do anything but move around. Everything graphical wise in this game sucks dick. There’s not even an animation for the guy walking. There’s no animation at all, and there’s no separate picture for walking backwards, he just slides backwards or forwards, or jumps into the air really high.

Sound:

Like I said before, the song is good. There aren’t any sound effects though. Which is probably a good thing.

Gameplay:

You jump…and go straight. You can’t see where you’re going at all though, because the view is always not far enough to the right to see anything.

Crappiest part:

The crappiest part would be everything minus the music. More work probably went into finding the music than the rest of the game.

Overall Score:

(insert fog horn sound). This game isn’t worth getting unless you want to listen to the song. I give it a 1/10. The 1 is for the song.

  Johnny (PC) (7.1 MiB, 1,041 hits)

Game by PG Games, made with Game Maker.

Jetz Rampage (PC) Review

Developer: Shawn64’s Creations

  Jetz Rampage (PC) (3.2 MiB, 1,017 hits)

Game by Shawn64's Creations, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

Everyone needs a story to go on a rampage, right? Not Jet! He can go on a rampage just for the hell of it, and this is what he does in this game.

Graphics:

The graphics are very good. I like how everything looks, but the explosions maybe could have looked better. But it’s alright.

Sound:

I think there’s only one song, and its the title screen song. That song is kinda weird, has a lotta bass in it or something. The sound effects are good, and goes well with the game. There’s a lot of South Park sound effects

Gameplay:

The gameplay is really good. The game is fun to fly around and shoot shit. Its really hard though, I haven’t gotten off the 1st level. One thing that was kind of annoying is that you can’t go in front of buildings, you just knock on the edges of it. But your bullets can go past the front of the building…yeah..

Crappiest Part:

How your mom will not like this game.

Overall Score:

This is a very good game, and a pretty original one, too. It is very nicely made, though there are parts that could get worked on.

9/10

  Jetz Rampage (PC) (3.2 MiB, 1,017 hits)

Game by Shawn64's Creations, made with Game Maker.

Jetpack Joe (PC) Review

Developer: Smiling Psycho Productions

  Jetpack Joe (PC) (1.3 MiB, 1,047 hits)

Game by Smiling Psycho Productions, made with Game Maker.

(i had to put “Jetpack Joe” under it =P)

Overview:

Though there isn’t a story inside the game yet, this is what its supposed to be about: aliens are secretly invading earth and this average Joe gets ahold of one of their jetpacks, so now what does he do? Being Earth’s last hope and all, he decides to go on a beer run. And that is the stupid premise of the game.

Graphics:

The graphics are great when it comes to the Jetpack that Joe is on, Joe himself, and the gray smasher things. Very good work on those. But it gets kind of cheesy when it comes to the beer, kegs, mines, and spikes.

Sound:

There is no music in the game, but the sounds are good for the blowing up and the jetpack. Oh and there’s another sound when you press “F” on the keyboard….har har…

Gameplay:

The gameplay is very good, I liked it a lot. I actually would like to see the finished product of this game.

Crappiest Part:

How Joe only blows up and doesn’t fall out of his chair screaming to his death, or gets smashed against the wall. But really, the only bad things about this game is that it take a little long to load (and i have a really fast computer), and the annoying flashing green thing behind Joe that is there all the time.

Overall Score:

This game is not finished, unfortunately, but its still worth checking out. I give it a:

8/10

  Jetpack Joe (PC) (1.3 MiB, 1,047 hits)

Game by Smiling Psycho Productions, made with Game Maker.

Infiltrator Deathmatch, The (PC) Review

Developer: GZ Soft

  The Infiltrator Deathmatch (PC) (1.6 MiB, 1,014 hits)

Game by GZ Soft, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

This game is all about shooting different types of weapons, and killing other AI players in the same map.

Graphics:

The graphics have nothing especially special, but the sprites are made very well.

Sound:

I couldn’t seem to get any music to work, though it said there was some.

Gameplay:

The gameplay is awesome once you figure out what you do to control your guy. The only bad thing about it is that it took me a while to figure out how to shoot the guns, drop a weapon to pick up another one. I couldn’t find anywhere that explained it, but I might have missed it.

Crappiest Part:

How you die a lot =(. There is no crappy part about this game, except maybe the top down aspect of it, but I can’t see this game played any other way.

Overall Score:

This game is one of the best I’ve ever played, made with Game Maker, and I recommend that anyone that isn’t politically correct and against violent games download this game. There are 3 modes of gameplay, 5 maps, and 5 unique weapons. Its fun, and keeps you entertained for many half an hours to come.

9.5/10

  The Infiltrator Deathmatch (PC) (1.6 MiB, 1,014 hits)

Game by GZ Soft, made with Game Maker.

Hobbit, The (PC) Review

Developer: Cybershark

  The Hobbit (PC) (620.8 KiB, 1,008 hits)

Game by Cybershark, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

This is a game called The Hobbit. Yes, its about the book that J.R.R. Tolkien wrote. OR IS IT?!? Hint: its not.

Graphics:

They suck. Stupid gnomes, one wizard, and floating spiders are the only things in the game. The guy you are is some stupid thing that doesn’t have his legs moving at all. And he has no feet. He’s jumping around on stubs!

Sound:

Its a stupid song. It has an “adventurous” feel to it, but there IS no adventure in this game.

Gameplay:

….you jump….and move….and “swing” which more like a flicking of the sword. He’s a mean sword flicker…you’ll know what I mean if you play it.

Crappiest Part:

How it has NOTHING-TO-DO-WITH-THE-HOBBIT

Overall Score:

Fuck this game. Fuck it right up the ass!!!111!!!111111111111112

2/10

  The Hobbit (PC) (620.8 KiB, 1,008 hits)

Game by Cybershark, made with Game Maker.

GMPet (PC) Review

Developer: Liberty Freak

  GMPet (PC) (577.6 KiB, 1,007 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

GMPet

THE EPIC

(review)

Overview:

This is a game about a pet- NO! this is a game about a young boy… and a computer. It all started like this (names have been changed to protect the innocent):

Melvin: Blegh!

Melvin had a mom

Melvin: Life sucks!

His mom hated animals

Melvin: She thinks they cause homosexuality!

Melvin never had that cute little puppy in the window, or that great big dog next door.

Melvin: I did have a computer!

Thats right Melvin. You hung in there and made your own pet!

Melvin: I’m like.. GOD or something!

You da man! …anyway… after Melvin had years of feeding then bathing then feeding his pet again and again… he decided to bless everyone on his block with his NEW kind of pet.. the kind you can kill or turn off, then load back up in a year and still have a healthy relationship with– speaking about health… Melvin was about to die.

Melvin: Oh god!

God: Oh god? don’t you mean oh you?

Melvin: I didn’t mean it! it’s just a computer program! It’s not blasphemy!

God: BLASPHEMY?! You stupid– you can go to HELL!

Melvin: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Overall Score:

I give this game a 2/10 because it inspired me to put off my english essay.

  GMPet (PC) (577.6 KiB, 1,007 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

Gloom (PC) Review

Developer: Grashaboras

  Gloom (PC) (1.4 MiB, 1,078 hits)

Game by Grashaboras, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

The world of Gloom isn’t a very happy one. Its, dare I say…gloomy? In Gloom, you’re a marine that was sent to a planet to guard the portals to an evil dimension full of demonic aliens, because you killed another marine when you were on duty sometime before, and that’s where they send marines that do bad things. Well, guess what? The portal opened up or whatever, and the whole planet of Phobos is run over with demon aliens.

Graphics:

The graphics are pretty good, I’d say that the sprites were worked on quite a bit. The background and the floors/walls, etc. aren’t special, but they accomplish what they are there for.

Sound:

The sound is actually very good in this game. The music is good for the mood, and the gun sounds don’t get annoying at all.

Gameplay:

The gameplay is pretty good. You point and shoot stuff with the mouse, which makes it kind of more interactive, I suppose. There are some pretty cool weapons in this game too. I only got so far as the level where you get Double Machine Guns, because this game gets really HARD after about 6 levels or so.

Crappiest Part:

The crappiest part is probably the enemy AI. 2 of the enemies I’ve seen just charge you when you get close to them, and then they’re like right on top of you, so you have to jump up and down to shoot them. It would’ve been better if there was a movie kind of thing between each level, instead of having to read a paragraph or 2 of story, even though the story is pretty good.

Overall Score:

This game is good, but definitely could have been improved a little bit more. Its one of the better games I’ve seen made with GameMaker. 8/10

  Gloom (PC) (1.4 MiB, 1,078 hits)

Game by Grashaboras, made with Game Maker.

Ghostie 2 (PC) Review

Developer: Liberty Freak

  Ghostie 2 (PC) (655.9 KiB, 1,088 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

I made this title, I guess he was too lazy to put a 2 on the end

Overview:

This is exactly like Ghostie, but with a few little additions…like slime and gas as new enemies! whoa! i didn’t see them because I couldn’t figure out how to get past the first level! And supposedly you can kill the snowmen and some “secrets” that are probably non-existant

Graphics:

The same as Ghostie, but oh, what’s this? I see 3 new, original (most likely) sprites? hallelujah! a different colored Ghostie ghost, some blue star thing that kills you on touch and a skull that’s in the way of you getting to the second level if there is one! YAY!!

Sound:

The sound is good. Its another song from the vast library of Liberty Freak. yeeehawww…give me more songs! or tell me where you get them…

Gameplay:

wow, you can move AND if you press the space bar, you get a little surprise…..YOU COMMIT SUICIDE! WHAT A GREAT CONTROL!!!!! WHY THE HELL IS THIS A CONTROL?!!!111!!!111 (the ones are intentional)

Crappiest Part:

Contrary to what I said for Ghostie, I said there was no story. Well now that there IS one, its the crappiest part. This is the story (copy and pasted): After your recent success at making everyone miserable, you take a trip to your homeworld to relax for a while. As you arrive, you suddenly realise that things are wrong. Your world is a total wreck. All your fellow ghost have disappeared. You see a new, dirty skyscaper towering above you. You go inside.

Overall Score:

Ghostie 2 is a little bit better than its predecessor, but not by much. With vast additions, such as suicide, a new song, and 3 snowmen in a row throwing presents simultaneously, this is a 5 STAR DOWNLOAD! YAAA! not really. I give it a:

7/10

  Ghostie 2 (PC) (655.9 KiB, 1,088 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

Ghostie (PC) Review

Developer: Liberty Freak

  Ghostie (PC) (591.2 KiB, 1,035 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

This is…a kinda weird game. Its a maze game…I think…and clowns, fire, evil aliens, mines, stars, and presents launched by snowmen are your enemies. The point is to get to the black dot. The weird blue clowns give you points for some reason…and I don’t know how many levels this thing has…it seems like it goes on forever…

Graphics:

Average. I don’t know what to say. It looks like all these except maybe the ghost were all taken from the sprites included in the game maker package.

Sound:

I actually like the sound a lot. It goes well with a “ghost” themed game…but this isn’t much of one to say the least, besides the fact the character is a ghost. If you replaced Ghostie with a piece of crap, it’d be Poopie and it wouldn’t do anything more than Ghostie would.

Gameplay:

there’s 4 controls….up….down….left…………………………………..and……………………….man i can never remember the last one…

Crappiest Part:

I don’t know what the hell is going on!

Overall Score:

Ghostie is pretty dumb, but I SUPPOSE its a little fun…I give it a:

6/10

  Ghostie (PC) (591.2 KiB, 1,035 hits)

Game by Liberty Freak, made with Game Maker.

Game Maker Poker (PC) Review

Developer: Delta9 Games

  Game Maker Poker (PC) (565.2 KiB, 1,108 hits)

Game by Delta9 Games, made with Game Maker.

Overview:

A basic poker game…whoopee

Graphics:

Uhh…they look like they were copy and pasted from solitaire…

Sound:

No music. boooooo. I wanna listen to some tunes while i gamble off my imaginary money!

Gameplay:

eh. Its poker, what do you expect..

Crappiest Part:

That damn rainbow colored cursor!

Overall Score:

This is a poker game, I don’t know what much more you can expect from it. I give it a:

8/10

  Game Maker Poker (PC) (565.2 KiB, 1,108 hits)

Game by Delta9 Games, made with Game Maker.