Download: Switcher

Warning: This program does not work as it is intended. Only use it if you want to fuck up your text files!

  Switcher (2.9 MiB, 958 hits)

Made by Adman. This program opens text files (including html), and replaces one or two words or phrases or whatever with whatever you want. Pretty nifty? There's a slower version included if the program freezes when you try it. It also messes up the whole file, so its more of a novelty item or something that you can use to screw up someone else's documents...

 

Old Lesbians Handing Out Cats

These two old ladys have like, 90000 cats, kittens and they are very cute and I want one. I asked, and they said ok, but my momther said, “no.”

I said, whawhahwhaaaaawhyyyyyyyyyyy they are sooooo cute and nice she said, no, and because i said so.

So i said, “boooom!” and she fell and she picked up the ballon and got up my wall is beeping beeeep beeep beeeep beeeep beeeep beeep beeep

damn
what is that
sh-
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

damn alarm clock

Last night, my little sister and her freind came into my room and told me they had a kitten in her room. I went in and they had it in a ziplock baggie (gallon sized), which was a bit odd, she said they were gonna sneek it into her friends house, and her dad would probly let her keep it, they wouldent let it out, so in best interest of the cat I poked a few holes in the bag, (thought i saw his face change colors, heh), my sister said she got it out of some old ladys house, and I thought she had stole it, but the next day on the way to summer school, there was a sign on the garage door that said you could take them (the garage was open a bit) so I reached in and picked one up, and he was sooooooo cuuuuuuuuutttte, and this old lady came out and she was sooo olddd and sooooo cutttteeee, and (if youve seen “Happy Gilmore” you know what im talking about) she was like “Do you want a kitten”, i was like AWWWWWWWWWWWWW that was sooooo cuttttee and a small child walked up behind me (if youve experienced the magic of Sherly Temple, you know what im talking about) and she said “Can I hold her”, I was like AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWww, AWWWWWWWwWWWWWWwWWWW, then i put the cat down and speed walked away, because it was getting really weird…

I want my kitty. My cat is so good, and pretty, and nice, but she might not like a little kitten around the house and Deda knows best my cat is really cool man, im asking her if she wants a kitten around and she said, “meow.”

I want to get it. I dont know if i can just walk up and take it. I wonder if i can break in to their garage.

That day my little sister took one the other day, and gave it to her friend, it pissed me off, because her dad was just like “Oh, a cat, you cant have that.”

She said, “Why?” and hes all “Ohhh, wellllll, ok. Do you need to stop at the pet shop?”

I was like, “What the hell man”

My moms just like, “no.”

so thats why she is screwed up…

 

Adman’s Endless Babble

i really like those catch phrases that are not real words, or just happen to be dumb like:

waka waka waka – someone from the muppets

wa wa wa – chachi on happy days

whutyoutalkinboutwillis – arnold from different strokes

lucy, youb goss som splainin to doooo – ricky from I love lucy

waaaaaaaaa – lucy from i love lucy

wEll – sammantha (sam) from Bewitched

I smell trouble! – dog, from cat dog

I’M READY – sponge bob square pants, from eh, himself

super doppler 7 – some chick from abc 7

beltway – some chick from abc 7

mumblemumblemumble adam – my mom

i also really like breaking old computers, like a tandy 2000 i came across, the piece of scheiss didnt even tell the time correctly, so i stripped the boards for components and crushed it into powered silicon, and shot the dust, and pissed on it (my cat too, i mean, he pissed on it too, i didnt piss on her…), and then i buirried some of my dead birds with it, and… ummmm, put dirt on it….

 

Adman’s Killer Instinct

as I lay prone, still, almost lifeless in appearance, holding my dasiy and sighting in on the unlucky pest, I watched carefully in apprehension of being spotted, I could only take one shot, they would pinpoint me with two, trying hard to remain part of the woods, adjusting my ghillie, repositioning my grip, I took a deap breath and exhaled it slowly, an icy chill came about my whole body as if foreshadowing my fate, I took careful aim, only to stop to doulbe check my action, “a bit of dirt couldent hurt it more than to dull its luster” I told myself, another breath I took, only to exhale and hold at that point, aiming carefully I slowly pulled the trigger back, feeling the last of the slack, I let my finger tighten, hold and rechecking my aim, I finished the pull with a slight jerk, holding my aim as to make sure the shot had cleared the barell, the black mass of feathers landed with a dull thud and an explosion of others, I knew that one was all I could take today, holding my aim as I stood, slowly I drew a Beretta from my side, creeping up on the downed animial I worried much of the condition of my pistol, if it were indeed loaded, the action may be flushed with mud, a misfire could mean death, but I kept on, almost 10 yards from the beast, I slowed my pace, almost to a halt, when examining the lifeless mass more closely, it seemed most reasuring to me that this animal was totally still, foolishly I holstered my weapon and drew closer, knealing at the kill, I started at it, he lay there dead, I redrew my weapon and placed 15 rounds into the body of the bird, stuck a stick through him, and hurled his ass into my neighbors yard, hehehe

 

Adman: How I Feel

reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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and that is how i really feel.

 

Adman’s Hangover

woow, I am hung over because i drank a bottle of wine last night

fub fub fub fub

oi

wubwubwubwubwub

hehehe

I sound like that crab from that show, Futurama

I’m not having fun being hung over. nooo

I have a headache

and another

and another

and heres one i just found

My mouth is dry, my pee is green, my eyes are soar, my peener is hardly funcioning, I woke up before I knew something about a railroad, and I’m ummmmm, unhappy

That dream was coool

I was some little boy, and my father was sending me away on a kayak

Well

After the shooting, or it was at a school or somthing and i got a few meters off the shore and soemthing happened and i got upgraded to some really nice train but i pushed it, and it was horse driven and the track split up ahead. I hit my cat, but she was ok, but it wasnt my cat. It was something else. I dont know what cuz i woke up damn phone. Dreams are soo cool, I wish I could finish a dream once in a while I wonder what it would look like.

Would there be credits??

 

#6292: davepoobond -> Adman

davepoobond: they cloned a kitty

Adman: WHERE!

davepoobond: in texas

Adman: KITTYS KICK SOME MAJOR AZZZZZZZZZ

Adman: really

Adman: im a texan

davepoobond: yeah

Adman: an AT-6 Texan taildragger

davepoobond: k

Adman: no, i am a texan

Adman: a real one

davepoobond: k

Adman: ..

Adman: k

davepoobond: k

 

#6200: Adman -> davepoobond

Adman: yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyo

Adman: fasdlkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

Adman: fdskjldddddddddddddddd

Adman: ddddddddddddddd

Adman: dddddddddddddddd

Adman: dddddddddddd

Adman: thats coooo

Adman: slam

Adman: someone got off aim

Adman: weeeeeeeee

Adman: thats not cooooool

Adman: rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre

Adman: reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: not kneeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: weeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: ceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Adman: keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Adman: peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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Adman: peeeeeeeeee

Adman: peeeepeeeee

Adman: tttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeee

Adman: meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

davepoobond: k

 

UPDATE 3-2-03

davepoobond: Post on the Bulletin Board! its funnnnnnnn!

Adman: THAT CORNED BEEF IS PRETTY DARN CORNED!

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 2050 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

The Screwed Up Games – Fun Tournament (PC) (Rating: 2/10), Ghostie (PC) (Rating: 6/10), Ghostie 2 (PC) (Rating: 7/10), Speed Cookie (PC) (Rating: 3/10)

Questionable Content / Moviesdavepoobond vs. blowthetoad 2, The Square-Enix Deal, My Name Is Asshole, puke

Squackle Broadcasting Company (SBC)Movie: Robot Porn

Submit To SquacklePicture Submission – only submit .gif, .jpg and .png pictures here

Squackle QuotesMs. Boms, Mrs. Biology Bitch, davepoobond, Mr. P-yooson

The Bad Submission ArchiveBad Submission 73, Bad Submission 74, Bad Submission 75