Category Archives: Prank IMs

1 to 1 pranks.

#10679: davepoobond -> YoungProphecy189

davepoobond: hey bro

YoungProphecy189: i dont know who this is

davepoobond: good

davepoobond: and that impacts me how

YoungProphecy189: how am i your bro if i dont know you

davepoobond: how are you my bro……if……..?

davepoobond: what does if mean?

davepoobond: you suck

YoungProphecy189: davepoobond (9:22:06 PM): hey bro

YoungProphecy189: how the fuck am i your bro

davepoobond: i ruv you

I get warned to 35%.

I warn him to 10%.

davepoobond: HA U LIKE THAT

YoungProphecy189: STOP BOTHERIN ME

#10678: davepoobond -> Trance N Dent

davepoobond: is it true?

Auto response from Trance N Dent: Blit

Trance N Dent: is what true

davepoobond: that you like cinnamon and gay sex

Trance N Dent: yeah 🙁

davepoobond: that’s appaling

davepoobond: i’ll never forget those nights

davepoobond: i wonder if it was a dream

davepoobond: all night i was screaming

davepoobond: and baby when i get you back

davepoobond: i’ll show you what i’m made of

Trance N Dent: tru whos this?

Trance N Dent: obvious a kid ahaha

Trance N Dent: well I gotta get back to tha game

davepoobond: i wouldn’t be singing boys of summer to you if i were a kid

davepoobond: loser

Auto response from Trance N Dent: Blitday is friday everybody commin up my way trying grub on tha yayo niggas cant say no to this shit it hits like 2 ton brick.

#10580: davepoobond -> dinsageofpower

davepoobond: hey gertrude

dinsageofpower: what?

dinsageofpower: who is this?

davepoobond: its me! dave! y’know, i rented you out last night

davepoobond: and you gave me your AIM sn cause you wanted to talk to me again

dinsageofpower: THIS IS NOT A WHORE, GO AWAY

davepoobond: what the hell?

davepoobond: gertrude, don’t be messing around…

davepoobond: you’re gonna lose a customer

dinsageofpower: MY NAME IS NOT GERTRUDE FUCK DAMMIT

dinsageofpower: GO AWAY

He warns me to 35%.

I warn him to 49% from 19%.

dinsageofpower: FINE

dinsageofpower: ILL MEET U SAME PLACE 9:00

I warn him to 64%.

dinsageofpower signed off at 3:28:59 PM.

#10579: davepoobond -> Aubaine II

davepoobond: chuck u. farley

Aubaine II: what?

davepoobond: CHUCK U FARLEY

Aubaine II: what is that supposed to mean?

davepoobond: CHUCK.

davepoobond: U.

davepoobond: FARLEY.

Aubaine II: why are you saying that?

davepoobond: CHUCK YOU FARLEY switch the CH and F…

Aubaine II: i don’t know and charley…so why are you saying that?

davepoobond: man you’re slow

Aubaine II: yes…I am

davepoobond: FUCK YOU CHARLEY

Aubaine II: ok, I understand your saying that, but why?

davepoobond: cause i hate you and your mom

Aubaine II: I don’t know you

davepoobond: and that stops me from hating you why?

Aubaine II: I don’t know

davepoobond: :-[

Aubaine II: ?

davepoobond: :-X

Aubaine II: Indeed…

davepoobond: :'(

davepoobond: lame ass

Aubaine II: who are you?

davepoobond: kurt hamet

Aubaine II: don’t know any kurt’s

davepoobond: have you seen Pearl Harbor

Aubaine II: yes

davepoobond: did you like it

Aubaine II: it had too much of a love story, took too long to get to the main part

Aubaine II: but it was alright

davepoobond: there’s no love story…what are you talking about

davepoobond: its just a buncha kids having sex in a parachute hangar

Aubaine II: close enough…

davepoobond: and they always show the money shot

davepoobond: i bet you like those dont you

Aubaine II: money shot?

davepoobond: yeah, the cum shot

davepoobond: where they show them having the orgasm

Aubaine II: I personally thought Tora Tora Tora was a better movie on Pearl Harbor….what does this have to do with anything anyways?

davepoobond: hrmm

davepoobond: lemme think

Aubaine II: take your time

davepoobond: sorry what

Aubaine II: nevermind

davepoobond: sweet dreams of rhythm and dancing

davepoobond: sweet dreams of passion througghhh the night

davepoobond: sweet dreams are taking overrrr

davepoobond: sweet dreams of dancing through the nighhtttt!

Aubaine II: ok…

davepoobond: oh now i remember

Previous message was not received by Aubaine II because of error (5:56:15 PM): User Aubaine II is not available.

I tried to warn him then, but it wouldn’t allow it.

#10578: davepoobond -> BubbaTyler2005

davepoobond: bubba tylerrrr

BubbaTyler2005: who is this

davepoobond: bubba dave

BubbaTyler2005: ?

BubbaTyler2005: do i know you

davepoobond: maybe

davepoobond: we’re the same relative

BubbaTyler2005: what are you smoking

BubbaTyler2005: do i know you

BubbaTyler2005: have i seen your face

davepoobond: yes

davepoobond: heehee

davepoobond: guess who i am

BubbaTyler2005: david?

davepoobond: dammit

davepoobond: what gave me away?

BubbaTyler2005: am i right

BubbaTyler2005: the dave

davepoobond: hmmm

BubbaTyler2005: david who

davepoobond: guess

BubbaTyler2005: in studyhall

davepoobond: i dont have study hall

davepoobond: well if i do, i dont know, cause i skip that everyday

BubbaTyler2005: just tell me

BubbaTyler2005: what school do you go 3

BubbaTyler2005: 2*

davepoobond: #3

BubbaTyler2005: im this close to blocking you till i find out

davepoobond: if you do you’ll get a nasty surprise

davepoobond: mwahahahaha

BubbaTyler2005: ?

BubbaTyler2005: tell me in 5

BubbaTyler2005: 4

BubbaTyler2005: 3

BubbaTyler2005: 2

BubbaTyler2005: 1

davepoobond: Greenwood

davepoobond: :-\

BubbaTyler2005: what school do you go to

davepoobond: told uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

BubbaTyler2005: greenwood

davepoobond: y eah

davepoobond: y e a h

BubbaTyler2005: what state do you live in

davepoobond: Greenland

BubbaTyler2005: brb

davepoobond: i bet you just said that so i wouldnt say anything anymore

davepoobond: you dont even have your away message on

davepoobond: even more reason why i shouldnt believe you are “brb”

davepoobond: but your wrongggg

BubbaTyler2005: k back

BubbaTyler2005: what?

BubbaTyler2005: how old are you?

davepoobond: 45

BubbaTyler2005: and are you gay?

davepoobond: WHAT GIVES YOU THAT IDEA

BubbaTyler2005: your screen name

BubbaTyler2005: dave POO

davepoobond: ….

davepoobond: and that makes me gay how

davepoobond: are you saying poo is a gay word?

BubbaTyler2005: yes

BubbaTyler2005: your not 45

davepoobond: i meant 13

davepoobond: or was it 31

BubbaTyler2005: if your 31 you have no life at all

BubbaTyler2005: talking to strangers

BubbaTyler2005: that are male

davepoobond: so are you

davepoobond: so i guess that means your gay

BubbaTyler2005: your the one who started talking to me and im not 31

BubbaTyler2005: lmao

BubbaTyler2005: or a flaming hommo

davepoobond: hommo

davepoobond: hommmo

davepoobond: hommmmmmmmmmmmo

davepoobond: 8989898

davepoobond: 321654987

davepoobond: 0

davepoobond: har har

BubbaTyler2005: ok im leaving now

davepoobond: k bye

BubbaTyler2005: peace out

davepoobond: hi

I warn him to 35%.

#10577: davepoobond -> BtownsBlueAngel

davepoobond: then there was youuuuuuuuu

davepoobond: and everything went from wrong to right

davepoobond: and the stars came up and filled up the sky

davepoobond: it was love at first site

BtownsBlueAngel: who tha hell is this

davepoobond: ……………..kylie minogue

davepoobond: who that hell is that

BtownsBlueAngel: ?

davepoobond: u

davepoobond: !!

BtownsBlueAngel: um…………..ok dude

davepoobond: die die die my darling

BtownsBlueAngel: When someone loves you, they will try and do anyhting for you. They will help you in anyway. If you send this to 11 people something good will happen to you at 10:00 o ‘clock tomorrow morning

davepoobond: why would i send that to anyone

BtownsBlueAngel: i dunno… who is this

davepoobond: i told you

davepoobond: kylie minogue

BtownsBlueAngel: a/s/l

davepoobond: 34/bi/NY

BtownsBlueAngel: um..ok

davepoobond: u

BtownsBlueAngel: 17/f/alabama

davepoobond: you’re close but no cigar

davepoobond: i dont wanna hear ittt

BtownsBlueAngel: uh..ok

davepoobond: and i wont waste my time fitting innnnnn

davepoobond: cause i dont think something something

davepoobond: lame

davepoobond: have you seen Pearl Harbor

BtownsBlueAngel: yes

davepoobond: did you liiiiike it

BtownsBlueAngel: sure

davepoobond: fly away on my zephyr, we’re gonna live foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

davepoobond: forever!

BtownsBlueAngel: ok dude

davepoobond: ok

#10574: davepoobond -> crummyBJ69

I was acting like a porn bot, sending a link to Squackle as “quality porn”

davepoobond: Quality Porn! GO NOW!

crummyBJ69: who is this

davepoobond: i’m a bot, don’t talk to me

davepoobond: har har har

davepoobond: see, i’m laughing at you

davepoobond: and that’s a computer laugh

davepoobond: hello are you there

davepoobond: did you go

After a while, I warn him to 5%.

#10572: davepoobond -> OdinForever

davepoobond: do you know where i can find spock

OdinForever: go downstairs and then the second door to the right

davepoobond: ah…

davepoobond: but that doesnt make sense

davepoobond: i dont have any doors

OdinForever: umm

OdinForever: then take a left

OdinForever: then a left

OdinForever: and repeat the cycle

davepoobond: but then i’ll go left forever

OdinForever: pretty much

davepoobond: what would that accomplish

OdinForever: spock

davepoobond: i wouldn’t find spock

davepoobond: i need an address

davepoobond: hellooooo

OdinForever: who is spock and who are you

davepoobond: YOU DONT KNOW WHO SPOCK IS

OdinForever: does he sell weed?!?

davepoobond: …..yes…..

davepoobond: 😀

OdinForever: I like spock

OdinForever: lets go on a pilgramage to find spock

davepoobond: ok where do we start

OdinForever: …second door to the right

davepoobond: i dont have that many doors ok

OdinForever: first door then?

davepoobond: just my front door, back door

davepoobond: side door

davepoobond: ceiling door

davepoobond: ground door

davepoobond: barbecue door

davepoobond: and my dresser drawer door

OdinForever: dresser drawer then. Alice in Wonderland style

OdinForever: just drink the solution

OdinForever: and we’ll shrink

davepoobond: ok whee look i shrunk

OdinForever: told ya!

OdinForever: and now to find the Cheshire Cat

OdinForever: he always helped alice out

davepoobond: i hate that fag. i’m gonna kill him

OdinForever: well if he’s dead we cant find Spock now can we?!

OdinForever: now chill out

davepoobond: HES DEAD

OdinForever: dont make me use my valium pills on U

davepoobond: oh no

davepoobond: not htat

davepoobond: that

davepoobond: hat

davepoobond: hate

davepoobond: that

OdinForever: dont stop there!

OdinForever: is that the best you can do

davepoobond: kinda

davepoobond: i’m sorry

OdinForever: pitiful

davepoobond: yeah it was

OdinForever: do I know U by any chance

davepoobond: maybe

OdinForever: possibly maybe?

OdinForever: I didn’t think so

davepoobond: possibly sublety maybe

OdinForever: how very Bjork of you

davepoobond: yes aint it

OdinForever: so how are we doing with finding Spock?

davepoobond: y’know, you coulda just told me the next starwars convention

davepoobond: where it was and such

davepoobond: since your common interest is science fiction

OdinForever: its Star Trek buddy

davepoobond: i knew that

davepoobond: wait…i didnt

OdinForever: and I dont like Star Trek at all its gay

davepoobond: wasn’t spock that hairy guy

davepoobond: that was always like “haaaaarr”

OdinForever: umm I dont know but I know he has pointy ears

OdinForever: who uses “buddy find wizard” nowadays anyway?

davepoobond: i do

OdinForever: im sorry

davepoobond: :-[

OdinForever: thats very crazy of you, ya’know

OdinForever: using buddy find wizard

OdinForever: just dont ever do it again and I forgive you

OdinForever: dammit I need to smoke more weed

davepoobond: i can see i picked the wrong guy with “odin” in his screen name today

OdinForever: wut did U expect, a chat about Star Trek?

OdinForever: no thanks

OdinForever: odin is a god BTW

davepoobond: yeah kinda…

davepoobond: i know that

davepoobond: i played FF8

davepoobond: doy

OdinForever: I loved ff8

OdinForever: was he in 8?

OdinForever: I dont remember

davepoobond: yeah

davepoobond: he appeared randomly

OdinForever: oh thats right

davepoobond: and chopped the shit out of the enemies

OdinForever: and he slashed with his house

OdinForever: horse

OdinForever: yeah

OdinForever: 8 was probly my second favorite

OdinForever: next to 10

davepoobond: yeah

OdinForever: 9 was overrated

davepoobond: but it was still good

OdinForever: yeah it was

The rest isn’t funny.

#10571: davepoobond -> NeoRamsay

davepoobond: Alec

NeoRamsay: hello?

davepoobond: hi

NeoRamsay: and who would you be?

davepoobond: dave

davepoobond: 423 Alabama Blvd, Los Angeles California

davepoobond: and you

NeoRamsay: tampa florida, and that’s the closest i’ll tell unless i have reason to otherwise, no offense

davepoobond: i told you my exact address man

davepoobond: wtf

davepoobond: you asked me who i was

davepoobond: and i told you everything that you wanted to know

davepoobond: and you only tell me your city

davepoobond: geez

davepoobond: now you’re probably gonna molest me

NeoRamsay: i asked who you were in referese to finding out if i knew you, you volunteered that info all on your own

davepoobond: HOW DID I KNOW THAT

NeoRamsay: i dunno, but i guess you assumed otherwise didnt you

davepoobond: yeah i guess so

NeoRamsay: i was just wondering if i should have known who i was talking to already or if this was someone new who got my SN off the net somewheres 😉

davepoobond: =-O

davepoobond: :'(

NeoRamsay: i do appologize if i started off wrong… its just usualy the random IMs i get nowadays are people off of the forums i frequent looking for me to send them something or another….

davepoobond: unh hunh..

#10567: davepoobond -> MrDruggedPolitic

davepoobond: so

davepoobond: are you happy now?

davepoobond: how is it now

davepoobond: are yo happy nowwwww

MrDruggedPolitic: what are you talkin about?

davepoobond: what are YOU talkin about

MrDruggedPolitic: i’m not talkin about anything

davepoobond: nor was i

MrDruggedPolitic: what the hell was all that about then?

davepoobond: all what

MrDruggedPolitic: so

davepoobond: are you happy now?

davepoobond: how is it now

davepoobond: are yo happy nowwwww

davepoobond: ….

davepoobond: i dont know what you’re talkin about

davepoobond: i didnt do that

MrDruggedPolitic: ok, who is this anyway

davepoobond: guess

MrDruggedPolitic: alan?

davepoobond: yeah that’s me

MrDruggedPolitic: k

davepoobond: you got it

davepoobond: how are you doing pal

MrDruggedPolitic: are you keepin this screen name?

davepoobond: had you going for a while

davepoobond: yeah, i think so

MrDruggedPolitic: mque

MrDruggedPolitic: do you have “my guitar wants to kill your mama”?

davepoobond: no, what is that

MrDruggedPolitic: is by frank zappa

davepoobond: never heard of it

davepoobond: did you tell me something about it before

MrDruggedPolitic: it’s a pretty good song

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: silly me, har har, i forgot about it

davepoobond: so how’s it going, buddy

MrDruggedPolitic: fine

MrDruggedPolitic: how did la bumba go?

davepoobond: eh it wasn’t as great as i thought

MrDruggedPolitic: you actually found people to blast music to while makin’ out?

davepoobond: not really, this old hag came along and started saying she’d call the cops

davepoobond: so we had to “disease and disperse”

davepoobond: as she said

MrDruggedPolitic: lol

davepoobond: she slurred like a bitch

davepoobond: she really meant decease

davepoobond: but you got the idea

davepoobond: she was shaking her cane around

MrDruggedPolitic: old people are always making up figures of speech

MrDruggedPolitic: or whatever you call it

davepoobond: damn conservatives

davepoobond: you cant even get some without conservatives telling you its wrong

davepoobond: there should be “Generation Cleansing” every 20 years

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: oh well

MrDruggedPolitic: old people are there to spread their great wisdom and experience but all they do is complain

davepoobond: not until I’m president of the world will that happen

MrDruggedPolitic: and talk about their pills

davepoobond: yeah

davepoobond: “claritin is so good for me…i dont sneeze anymore”

davepoobond: “yeah, so is the Perploxcoxin, i lost that bad ache in my back”

davepoobond: “oh perploxcoxin…i take that too”

davepoobond: they have their own language it seems

davepoobond: stupid drug names

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: have you seen Minority Report

MrDruggedPolitic: no

davepoobond: that’s a great movie man

MrDruggedPolitic: i wanted to see it but i never got around to it

davepoobond: you should

davepoobond: so how’s your girlfriend

davepoobond: i forgot her name

MrDruggedPolitic: i don’t have one remember?

davepoobond: oh yeah, that’s why i dont know her name

davepoobond: silly me

MrDruggedPolitic: ya, this isn’t alan

davepoobond: yeah ok, you got me

davepoobond: i had you goin for a while though huh

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: how did i do

MrDruggedPolitic: verticoe

davepoobond: did i talk like he did

davepoobond: like about the old people

davepoobond: and junk

MrDruggedPolitic: no

davepoobond: was that all just junk to test me or something

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: i knew it

MrDruggedPolitic: ok, so what’s your point in this?

davepoobond: i dont know

davepoobond: i’m bored

MrDruggedPolitic: ya, good way to waist time

davepoobond: yeah especially since its a part of the body

MrDruggedPolitic: ?

davepoobond: “waist”

MrDruggedPolitic: k

MrDruggedPolitic: waste is that better

davepoobond: yeah it is

MrDruggedPolitic: i screwed that up on my damn english project too

davepoobond: too bad

davepoobond: english is important

MrDruggedPolitic: english is a dumb language

davepoobond: would you rather be speaking another language

MrDruggedPolitic: probably

davepoobond: you know how the public service announcements say knowledge is the anti-drug

davepoobond: people that know all about the drug still do the drug

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: so i dont think that knowledge is the anti-drug

davepoobond: force is the anti-drug. if you put a gun to the person’s head everytime they reached for a smoke, they’d stop

davepoobond: don’t you agree

MrDruggedPolitic: i think the government is gay spending tons of money on anti-drug forces when they could spend it on other more useful things

davepoobond: like military

MrDruggedPolitic: i say let people do drugs if they want to

davepoobond: yeah, it’ll get rid of them

davepoobond: then we won’t have the problem

MrDruggedPolitic: ya

davepoobond: they don’t see that though

MrDruggedPolitic: it’s the same thing that happened with alchohol

#10566: davepoobond -> UkilledKenny

davepoobond: 😀

UkilledKenny: hi

davepoobond: 😀

UkilledKenny: who dis?

davepoobond: 😀

UkilledKenny: who r u?

davepoobond: 😀

UkilledKenny: who is this and if u don’t tell me i’m gonna black u

UkilledKenny: *block

davepoobond: dont block me

UkilledKenny: then tell me who u r

davepoobond: dave

UkilledKenny: k

davepoobond: i live at 4562 Stocker Avenue, Los Angeles, Alabama

UkilledKenny: i didn’t really need to kno ur address

UkilledKenny: wut’s ur asl?

davepoobond: well isnt that what you wanted to know

UkilledKenny: asl plz

davepoobond: cause you’re asking me who i was

UkilledKenny: nvm

davepoobond: 17/m/alabama

UkilledKenny: o ok

UkilledKenny: 13 f texas

davepoobond: confederates forever

UkilledKenny: ok then

UkilledKenny: tell me about urself

davepoobond: uhh no

UkilledKenny: k

davepoobond: tell me about u

UkilledKenny: wut u wanna kno?

davepoobond: sexual preference

UkilledKenny: wut about it

davepoobond: what is it

UkilledKenny: wut do u mean?

davepoobond: how do you take it

davepoobond: preferably

UkilledKenny: i’ve never had it lol

davepoobond: well that’s a turn off

UkilledKenny: ok then

davepoobond: but if you did where would you take it

UkilledKenny: i’m not sure

davepoobond: up the ass, in the ear

davepoobond: through the belly button

UkilledKenny: i rather have it up my ass than my ear

UkilledKenny: lol

davepoobond: 😀

UkilledKenny: k

davepoobond: so

Previous message was not received by UkilledKenny because of error: User UkilledKenny is not available.

#10565: davepoobond -> SatanaMcVixen18

davepoobond: suck it up you ninny

SatanaMcVixen18: n who the hell r u?

davepoobond: 😀

SatanaMcVixen18: ur so damn funny

davepoobond: 😀

davepoobond: so bitch

They warn me to 55% from 35%.

davepoobond: you did not just do that

SatanaMcVixen18: i did

I warn them to 5%.

SatanaMcVixen18: n ill block u too

davepoobond: fine

I warn him to 10%.

I get warned to 65%.

davepoobond: HA