Category Archives: Stupid IMs

These are the Stupid IMs. They’re stupid, duh. 1 to 1 messaging.

WoW Chat #22437: Kissandkillu -> davepoobond

I was posting this in Trade Chat:

“Tired of spending like 3 minutes or more on a typical heroic dungeon boss? Sick of seeing baddie dps doing less damage than the healer? Queue with a 402 ilvl dps! 100g/each normal or heroic dungeon. PST for invite!”

Kissandkillu: is that a guild invigte?

davepoobond: a what now

Kissandkillu: what?

Kissandkillu: do you wish for a g iviite

davepoobond: i have a sick

Kissandkillu: ??

Kissandkillu: lol do I know you

davepoobond: yes

Kissandkillu: then I wish you love and tons of happniess

WoW Chat #22436: Invisibad -> davepoobond

In Trade:

davepoobond: WTS  [Knotted Handwraps] 125g

Invisibad: il lgive ya 50

Invisibad: il lgive ya 50

davepoobond: nah

Invisibad: 60?

davepoobond: 125

davepoobond: its 150 on the ah

Invisibad: now ur stretching it ill go 85

davepoobond: im not stretching it, that was the original price

Invisibad: check my lvl

Invisibad: ok?

I do a /who and sees that he is level 45…

Invisibad:  iaint rich homie

davepoobond: well, i am

davepoobond: and id rather keep it than sell at that price

Invisibad: lol hunter leather

davepoobond: yes, lol 😛

davepoobond: cause i would never have an alt rogue

WoW Chat #22366: Gotswagger -> davepoobond

I am on a level 78 Death Knight, and a level 85 hunter whispers me…

Gotswagger: 2v2?

davepoobond: whosajiggawhat?

Gotswagger: well?

davepoobond: yeah ok

Gotswagger: tight!

Gotswagger invites me to a group.  A minute goes by, then he removes me from the group.  20 seconds later he invites me again, obviously trying to add me to his arena team to no success.

Gotswagger: not high enough

davepoobond: im really high

Gotswagger: lol

WoW Chat #22365: Glowann -> davepoobond

A level 60 hunter sees me on my Death Knight flying the Death Knight-only flying mount (meaning hunters cannot get that mount)…

Glowann: how do you get one of those?

Glowann: (flying mounts)

davepoobond: i bought it

Glowann: were

davepoobond: acherus

Glowann: and thats?

davepoobond: what

Glowann: were is acherus?

davepoobond: epl

Glowann: ty

Glowann: what level do you need to befor it?

Glowann: (flying mount)

Glowann: were in acherus?

davepoobond: vendor

Glowann: in the in the sky

davepoobond: ya

Glowann: dead commander thalanor?

davepoobond: idk

Glowann: whats the mount called?

davepoobond: [Winged Steed of the Ebon Blade]

Glowann: i can’t fined it

Glowann: 🙁

Glowann: ;(

Glowann: do you know were i can buy a dragon mount

Glowann: ?

davepoobond: no

Glowann: :/

Glowann: ty

WoW Chat #22364: Edwarto -> davepoobond

In trade chat I say:

davepoobond: WTS [Tremendous Tankard O’ Terror] pst offer

davepoobond: WTS [Flintrock Shoulders] – xmog gear 100g

And in whispers I get….

Edwarto: il buy it

Edwarto: il buy it

davepoobond: which one

Edwarto: the thing your selling

davepoobond: [Flintrock Shoulders]?

Edwarto: the thing u had on trade chat

davepoobond: [Tremendous Tankard O’ Terror]?

Edwarto: u know the one u had on trade chat u were advertising

davepoobond: yeah i put two items

davepoobond: those two

Edwarto: ya il take the one

davepoobond: you sure? the one that you want might not be the one that you want

davepoobond: it might be even two things in one

Edwarto: how much for it

davepoobond: depending on what the one thing is

davepoobond: well, depends on what one thing you want

davepoobond: do you want the thing that is one thing or the one thing that is two things

davepoobond: do you want the shoulders or the mace

WoW Chat #22142: davepoobond -> Sanydiusw

Sanydiusw is selling rare mounts in trade.

davepoobond: ill buy it for 10k

Sanydiusw: lol no thanks

davepoobond: how much for magic rooster egg then???

Sanydiusw: Cash

davepoobond: whats that

Sanydiusw: $

davepoobond: gold?

Sanydiusw: No

davepoobond: ??

davepoobond: can i trade you a copy of death to all humans: big willy unleashed

Sanydiusw: only real money.:(

davepoobond: and a flask of winds

Sanydiusw: Sorry.:P

Sanydiusw: sorry

davepoobond: what are you sorry for

Sanydiusw: coz we selling them in $.:)

davepoobond: who is we???

Sanydiusw: dollars

davepoobond: who

Sanydiusw: our company.:)

davepoobond: what is a that

Sanydiusw: i am a gold seller

davepoobond: i thought you said you dont want gold?

davepoobond: i have a sick

davepoobond: i need god to fix to my visa

#22095: DonutLover -> davepoobond

davepoobond is on a dating site… and then…

DonutLover: hey

davepoobond: hi

davepoobond: how’s it going

DonutLover: slowly..tired but not sleepy…

DonutLover: hows your night going

davepoobond: not bad, just trying to waste the last couple of hours of the day before going to sleep

DonutLover: i hear ya

DonutLover: how has this site been for you

davepoobond: pretty crappy actually, dont really get many interactions from people

davepoobond: you’re the 2nd person to actually say more than 1 thing to me heh

davepoobond: how about for you

DonutLover: hah, same deal, i look through these profiles and mostly find myself thinking …why does he have his shirt off or what a retard…i know…harsh critic

davepoobond: i see nothing but variations of “please keep your shirt on” or stuff like that on girls profiles

DonutLover: haha..really

davepoobond: yeah, its getting kinda boring at this point. i dont see any girls without their shirts on, so i’m wondering what i’m missing

DonutLover: im pretty sure theres some sluty gals around….put some effort into looking davepoobond

davepoobond: hahah well that was a joke 😛

DonutLover: “no”,,,,,”really”….?! lol

davepoobond: 😉

davepoobond: so whats your favorite kind of doughnut

DonutLover: Jelly filled…what about you

davepoobond: old-fashioned

davepoobond: as long as it doesnt taste like carrots

davepoobond: ive had one that tasted like carrots, it was very confusing

DonutLover: carrots?…were you high?

DonutLover: Kidding kidding

DonutLover: 🙂

davepoobond: no, it was the morning, so might as well have been

DonutLover: hahaha….

DonutLover: So…how was your monday

davepoobond: it was a normal monday i suppose. went to work and then came back home and watched some netflix

davepoobond: how about yours

DonutLover: well..didnt have to work..apparently its a presidents bday or something..but i did have to go fix some major paperwork mistakes i hid earlier in the week

DonutLover: what do you do for milk money kiddo

davepoobond: well uh Martin Luther King wasn’t a president, but i guess that’s close enough haha 😛

DonutLover: im glad you get my sarcasm..o.0

davepoobond: just makin sure!

davepoobond: i do video editing for an investigations company and freelance video editing as well on the side

DonutLover: sounds….entertaining…..

DonutLover: dot dot dot..lol

davepoobond: very. i’ve always been good with computers, and i love to act smart about things people dont know about, and no one knows anything about video, so therein lies where i make money

davepoobond: and i can rub it in people’s faces too and its easier to act like i know what im doing

DonutLover: arent you charming…hah, i must say i am jealous of tech geeks…there so useful..them and wilderness firefighters..

davepoobond: are you around a lot of fires in the wilderness?

DonutLover: no..but i mean..knowing me..im pretty sure..itll happen

davepoobond: guess it’d be good to keep a pocket fire extinguisher then

DonutLover: they have those?

davepoobond: sure. imagination makes anything possible.

DonutLover: hmmmm….itd be less weight if i just brought a wilderness ff along though

davepoobond: but how would he fit in your pocket

DonutLover: obviously gamers dudes dont use logics much..eh davebond

DonutLover: id carry him on my back

DonutLover: dah

davepoobond: how long have you had a profile for

DonutLover: not sure..i made it along time ago.and havent been on in a while…

davepoobond: into any movies at all?

DonutLover: classics…what are you into

davepoobond: everything

DonutLover: agh…thats specific

davepoobond: i was a film major, so there isn’t a movie that i can’t or won’t watch

davepoobond: the absolute worst movie i have ever seen was Da Hip Hop Witch

davepoobond: and i almost turned it off it was so terrible

DonutLover: haha…awkward

DonutLover: why were you even watching it?

davepoobond: whats your favorite classic movie then

davepoobond: cause i heard Eminem was in it, and that it was supposed to be a parody of The Blair Witch Project

davepoobond: and i thought he was going to be going through the woods with some middle schoolers

davepoobond: but it was nothing like that at all

DonutLover: hahahaha…goodness….i like how that appeals to you..well my classics are not the norms of the designated, i just prefer black and whites, anything with spencer tracey and older war flics..

davepoobond: spencer tracey huh.

DonutLover: for some reason i have no interest in modern comedy..like those bachlor films

DonutLover: tracy gable wayne..i know im a patriot

davepoobond: touch of evil and philadelphia are a couple of ones ive seen that i like

davepoobond: citizen kane until the end was great. i thought the ending was dumb

DonutLover: ive never seen citizen kane

DonutLover: what happens at the ending

davepoobond: geez i cant spoil the ending for you

davepoobond: there’d be no point in watching it

DonutLover: exactly

DonutLover: help a stranger out

DonutLover: odds are….youll enjoy it

davepoobond: enjoy what?

davepoobond: spoiling a movie?

DonutLover: haha….fine ill google it

DonutLover: goodness

davepoobond: at least im not the catalyst

DonutLover: you and your big words

davepoobond: indubitably

DonutLover: i concure

DonutLover: cure

DonutLover: hah

davepoobond: making up words now? awkward

DonutLover: awkwardly awesome

davepoobond: that was actually an inside joke.

davepoobond: cause i’ve made about oh i dont know… 6000 words

DonutLover: and how far has that got ya craphead

davepoobond: i dont know, ill let you know when it gets me somewhere

DonutLover: haha…so i guess well never know then

davepoobond: i found this one girl’s profile where she says she wouldnt mind sleeping on a grave for a first date

DonutLover: shes a keeper

She leaves the chat. Apparently she wasn’t very interested.

WoW Chat #21934: Slevinn -> davepoobond

In trade chat…

[2] [davepoobond]: i am almost at 3 million gold

Slevinn: how do you make so much gold

Slevinn: i will give you a bj for a million

davepoobond: r u a grl

Slevinn: yes

davepoobond: how big r ur boobs

Slevinn: 34c

davepoobond: what is the psi of your mouth

Slevinn: i have no gage reflex

davepoobond: psi!

davepoobond: pounds/square inch

Slevinn: is that like sucking pressure or what

davepoobond: yes

Slevinn: more then you can handle

davepoobond: sounds interesting

davepoobond: how much experience do you have

Slevinn: enough

davepoobond: do you have any personal references

Slevinn: haha not that play wow

davepoobond: i see…

davepoobond: i have inside sources that say 34c is small, do you beg to differ?

Slevinn: yeah

davepoobond: are there any extra addons

Slevinn: 4

davepoobond: 4 what

davepoobond: i meant like perks

davepoobond: what makes you different from the competition

davepoobond: 34c isnt small, its a nice size

davepoobond: i looked it up on google

WoW Chat #21923: davepoobond -> Edierit

In trade:

[2] [Edierit]: wts [Reins of the Swift Spectral Tiger] [Reins of the Spectral Tiger] [Vial of the Sands]

davepoobond: how much for spectral

Edierit: [Reins of the Swift Spectral Tiger]460$ [Reins of the Spectral Tiger]320$ [Vial of the Sands]55$

davepoobond: 460 gold?

Edierit: nono

davepoobond: what do you mean then??? i only have gold???

Edierit: sorry,enjoy your time

davepoobond: hello?

davepoobond: please cod it to me for 460 gold

Edierit: nono

davepoobond: why not????

davepoobond: you want 460 gold for it?

Edierit: i need money ,dude

davepoobond: but gold is money??

Edierit: is real money,i want ,im poor

davepoobond: why are you poor

Edierit: i have no job ,so

Edierit: goodbye man,enjoy your time

davepoobond: but your job is warlock?