Category Archives: Stupid IMs

These are the Stupid IMs. They’re stupid, duh. 1 to 1 messaging.

#10302: stimpyismyname -> PISSER1

This entry is part 1 of 2 in the series PISSER1

stimpyismyname: WCW RULES

PISSER1: HELL yea

stimpyismyname: whos your favorite wrestler

PISSER1: dont have one

stimpyismyname: oh

stimpyismyname: how about dildos

PISSER1: lol

PISSER1: Howd u get this sn

stimpyismyname: the internet

PISSER1: righttttttttttt

stimpyismyname: haha….

stimpyismyname: jk

stimpyismyname: this is tom johnson

PISSER1: lol

PISSER1: Oh hi

stimpyismyname: u remember me?

PISSER1: i dono no tom johnson

stimpyismyname: oh

stimpyismyname: thats what i thought

stimpyismyname: eh…

stimpyismyname: i was on the news a whlie back…

PISSER1: eh..rofl

PISSER1: rightt

stimpyismyname: i dont really want to talk about that

stimpyismyname: kinda embarrasing looking back

PISSER1: oh, u were never on the news

stimpyismyname: yeah

stimpyismyname: cnn

PISSER1: we

stimpyismyname: excuse me/

PISSER1: whatever

stimpyismyname: ok

PISSER1: fine

stimpyismyname: pisser?

stimpyismyname: whats that mean

PISSER1: yes?

PISSER1: it has no meaning

stimpyismyname: oh

stimpyismyname: just sounds cool

stimpyismyname: rolls off your tounge and such

PISSER1: Right, im sure it does

stimpyismyname: no i was askin you

stimpyismyname: whatever

PISSER1: lol

stimpyismyname: know whats weird/

PISSER1: wha

stimpyismyname: large cups from burger king dont fit in cupholders

stimpyismyname: butx large ones do

PISSER1: thats interesting

stimpyismyname: yep

stimpyismyname: suuuuure is

PISSER1: lol

PISSER1: indeed

PISSER1: so howd u really get my sn

stimpyismyname: have you heard Liquid Tension Experiment?

stimpyismyname: they’re cool

PISSER1: nope

stimpyismyname: yeah well

stimpyismyname: i made a couple stupid games

stimpyismyname: theyre on my site

stimpyismyname: www.geocities.com/stinkybeefisgood

stimpyismyname: yep

stimpyismyname: πŸ˜‰

PISSER1: O:-)

PISSER1: im afraid to click that

stimpyismyname: lol

stimpyismyname: ok

PISSER1: b.c my comp will freeze

stimpyismyname: its not about stinky beef or anything

PISSER1: lol i understand but still, better be safe

PISSER1: i dont want my comp to freeze

stimpyismyname: ok

stimpyismyname: havin fun ON LINE

PISSER1: U TOO

stimpyismyname: YEA

stimpyismyname: my god

PISSER1: what?

stimpyismyname: this is boring

stimpyismyname: lol

PISSER1: shit i know

stimpyismyname: what are you doin

stimpyismyname: just aim?

PISSER1: well im on aol too, but i cant im ppl with that b.c i have a virus

stimpyismyname: lol

PISSER1: lol shut up

stimpyismyname: u cant restart or anything/

PISSER1: well if i do restart, im still going to have the virus!

stimpyismyname: aaah

stimpyismyname: well that sux

PISSER1: YES

stimpyismyname: does it only affect aol?

PISSER1: i miss aol

PISSER1: yea

PISSER1: thats why im on aim

stimpyismyname: heh

PISSER1: YEPPPPPPPPPPPPP, so what u doing

stimpyismyname: watchin land before time 7

stimpyismyname: lol

stimpyismyname: my friend has the tv on

PISSER1: ROFL OMG

stimpyismyname: its so freakin gay

PISSER1: and ur friend is watching that?

stimpyismyname: yeah

stimpyismyname: hes an idiot

PISSER1: thats the one with the dinosaurs?

stimpyismyname: yeah

PISSER1: I watched the first one that came out. thats bout it.

stimpyismyname: yeah

stimpyismyname: i think i saw one

stimpyismyname: i dont really remember what happened

PISSER1: me either

PISSER1: brb…ice cream time.

stimpyismyname: yeah

stimpyismyname: im gonna get somethin

PISSER1: backk

stimpyismyname: ok

stimpyismyname: hi

PISSER1: hey

stimpyismyname: so…

stimpyismyname: hows the ice cream

PISSER1: goood

stimpyismyname: nice

PISSER1: whats going on

stimpyismyname: nuthin

stimpyismyname: whyd u get warned

PISSER1: some boy warned me

PISSER1: dono

PISSER1: i got him back

stimpyismyname: ok

PISSER1: hows the movie goin

stimpyismyname: i dont know whats happening

PISSER1: lol

stimpyismyname: theyre goin to some rock

PISSER1: haha kool

stimpyismyname: boy

stimpyismyname: this is gret

PISSER1: boy

PISSER1: LOL

PISSER1: welllll….hmmmmmmm…….i finished my ice cream

stimpyismyname: took you a while

PISSER1: big cup

stimpyismyname: really big

stimpyismyname: and a small spoon

PISSER1: rofl

PISSER1: no

PISSER1: it was a regular spoo

PISSER1: n

PISSER1: spoon

stimpyismyname: oh

stimpyismyname: well then

PISSER1: what

stimpyismyname: i dunnnno

stimpyismyname: my bros gonna talk to u

stimpyismyname: cuz i g2g go

stimpyismyname: bye

PISSER1: byee

#10301: davepoobond -> Malerie2003

davepoobond: hey

Malerie2003: hey

davepoobond: whats your rating

Malerie2003: ummm wut

Malerie2003: i have no ratine

Malerie2003: rating

davepoobond: GET WITH IT MAN

Malerie2003: i jsut got in the room

Malerie2003: chill lol

Malerie2003: and im a chic thank u

Malerie2003: lol

Malerie2003: wuts ur rating??

davepoobond: 56

davepoobond: ::fart::

davepoobond: excuse me::

Malerie2003: lmao

Malerie2003: mmmmkay

Malerie2003: that was sick

davepoobond: yeah it was ::squirt::

Malerie2003: so ummm is 56 good

Malerie2003: or wut

davepoobond: yeah, especially when its out of 10

Malerie2003: yea mmmkay

Malerie2003: so lets see ur pic then

davepoobond: <^>

davepoobond: I GAVE YOU THE FINGER

davepoobond: HOW DO YOU LIKE THAAAAAATTTTTT

Malerie2003: ummmm mmmkay

Malerie2003: i would say that u received a -56

Malerie2003: below 1

Malerie2003: 0

Malerie2003: cuz u suck

Malerie2003: haha

davepoobond: -56 is below 0?

davepoobond: wow……

davepoobond: that’s…………….

Malerie2003: yess it is

davepoobond: almost……….unbelieve

Malerie2003: duhh

davepoobond: able

Malerie2003: wut grade r u in

Malerie2003: 2nd

davepoobond: uhh 1st…

Malerie2003: ooook

Malerie2003: wutever

Malerie2003: u act it

Malerie2003: loser!

davepoobond: my mom said i can play on the computer for 10 minutes

davepoobond: so I downloaded aim, and got this screen name

davepoobond: hello

davepoobond: malerie

Malerie2003: wut

davepoobond: are you there

Malerie2003: umm yes

Malerie2003: i was ignoring u

davepoobond: helllooo? i cant see what yer saying, cuz i have you on ignore

Malerie2003: mmmkay

davepoobond: oh i saw that

davepoobond: how’d you do that

Malerie2003: got me

Malerie2003: i dont know

davepoobond: :'(

#10299: stimpyismyname -> lita / davepoobond -> lita

stimpyismyname: helllllo

lita: hi

stimpyismyname: whats happenin

lita: nmu??

stimpyismyname: same…

lita: kool

stimpyismyname: havin fun online/

stimpyismyname: mmm hmmm

lita: πŸ™‚

stimpyismyname: :-!

lita: lol

stimpyismyname: ok

lita: so…

stimpyismyname: you like…. stuff?

lita: yea

stimpyismyname: hah

stimpyismyname: cool

stimpyismyname: u like dildos

stimpyismyname: aha

stimpyismyname: ha…

stimpyismyname: im BORED

lita: me 2

stimpyismyname: so

stimpyismyname: do you?

lita: do i wat

stimpyismyname: like didlos

stimpyismyname: bye

stimpyismyname: heres my bro

lita: bye

lita: ok

lita: …

davepoobond gets on the computer.

davepoobond: i like dildos

davepoobond: i’m david johnson, just to tell you

lita: o

davepoobond: do you like dildos

#10293: davepoobond -> Holmes

davepoobond: welp

Holmes: help?

davepoobond: welp

Holmes: ARE YOU IN TROUBLE?

Holmes: oh

davepoobond: heh

Holmes: you can go welp yourself

davepoobond: go welp ur mom

davepoobond: >.>

davepoobond: hey can u give me a copy of this IM. i xed it out heh

Holmes: !

Holmes: HOW DARE YOU!

Holmes: ok

Holmes: I will welp your mom first

davepoobond: yeah well ur mom says “welp welp” all day

Holmes: I will NOT hear this!

davepoobond: and she just BEGS for people to come over and WELP her

Holmes: STOP IT!

davepoobond: NO

Holmes: *closes eyes* “I’m in a happy place, a happy happy place”

davepoobond: 98989123~!!

Holmes: DON’T MAKE FUN OF MY MOMS WEIGHT!

Holmes: your mom weighs 5 pounds

Holmes: it’s it’s 5 pounds WELP!

davepoobond: welp ur mom

Holmes: STOP IT

davepoobond: x2

Holmes: AHHHH

davepoobond: ahahahaha

Holmes: I can welp anything with more then 4 legs

davepoobond: klondike bars are gooood, just like ur moms welping

Holmes: STOP!

Holmes: i’m calling my mom

davepoobond: good, maybe i can get some welping tonight

Holmes: argh!

Holmes: she says you couldn’t welp like my dad even if you had extra welping power

Holmes: hahahhaha

davepoobond: yeah, well i have a whip welper helper that does 2 times as much as ur dad does in 1 second!

Holmes: well i have hamberger helper and it tastes like shit…like your moms welping!

davepoobond: OMG

davepoobond: ur askin for it now

Holmes: i’m askin for it…like a guy who asks for welping!

Holmes: …wait i’m missing something

Holmes: oh yeah

Holmes: FROM YOUR MOM!

Holmes: HAHAHAHHAHA

davepoobond signs on and off.

Holmes: ouch man…

Holmes: sorry

davepoobond: what for

Holmes: that welping got out of hand

davepoobond: ya…oh well

Holmes: shake hands

Holmes: ?

davepoobond: sure

Holmes: well..after i get welped by your mom!

Holmes: HAHAHAHAHHA

davepoobond: U BASTARD

Holmes: ouch man…you just went to far

Holmes: theres no need for name calling

davepoobond: i’m sorry

davepoobond: sorry ur so STUPID

Holmes: OUCH!

davepoobond: AHAHAHAH

Holmes: oh man you…you…napkin head!

davepoobond: go pee an acid puddle

Holmes: go get cranium pregnant

#10292: Holmes -> davepoobond

Holmes: ola

davepoobond: hey

davepoobond: sorry for not saying anything b4 i logged off

davepoobond: i got really busy

Holmes: ??

Holmes: when was this

davepoobond: yesterday

davepoobond: u asked if i was updatin squackle

Holmes: oh yeah

Holmes: it’s all good

Holmes: 😎

Holmes: i’m justv trying to survive writing this essay

davepoobond: heh

davepoobond: i gotta write one too…bleh

Holmes: damn school! i can’t believe i pay so much money for this shit

Holmes: to be struggling over writing a stupid essay on a stupid play

Holmes: writing on how good Hamlet is…what do they want me to do? jerk off to the thought of some freak who can’t kill his dads murderer?

davepoobond: heh

Holmes: too bad i can’t video tape me pissing on a book that I bought and turn it in instead of the essay

Holmes: “This is how Hamlet made me feel”

davepoobond: heh

#10291: davepoobond -> stimpyismyname

stimpyismyname sends davepoobond a chat invitation.

davepoobond: ass

stimpyismyname: what

davepoobond: u sent me an invitation

stimpyismyname: haha

stimpyismyname: ha…

davepoobond: u didnt even go

stimpyismyname: nope

stimpyismyname: thats correct dave

stimpyismyname: oooh

stimpyismyname: splinter cell

stimpyismyname: neat o

stimpyismyname: i rented wreckless

stimpyismyname: its ok

stimpyismyname: but really repetitive

stimpyismyname: mmmhmm

stimpyismyname: bad boys bad boys

stimpyismyname: WHAAAATCHA GONA WHATCHA GONNA DO

stimpyismyname: hey

stimpyismyname: dave

stimpyismyname: how come u no talk

davepoobond: …

davepoobond: bloo

stimpyismyname: ok

stimpyismyname: thanks

#10290: davepoobond -> GilbertsGurl

davepoobond: hi

GilbertsGurl: asl

GilbertsGurl: hi

davepoobond: 16/m

davepoobond: how about you/

GilbertsGurl: from where

davepoobond: i dont feel comfterble revealing that information. sorry

GilbertsGurl: give me a clue

GilbertsGurl: ok

davepoobond: ok

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: give me a clue

davepoobond: uhhhhh

davepoobond: no?

GilbertsGurl: pic

davepoobond: why dont you tell me something about yourself first

GilbertsGurl: like what

davepoobond: asl

GilbertsGurl: 13/f/wi

davepoobond: mmmkay

GilbertsGurl: any questions

davepoobond: hows wiyoming/

davepoobond: wyoming

GilbertsGurl: i am live in wisconsin

davepoobond: oooooh

davepoobond: sorry

GilbertsGurl: ok

davepoobond: tom johnson doesnt live in usa

GilbertsGurl: who is that

davepoobond: oh

davepoobond: thats me

davepoobond: sorry

davepoobond: i live in mexico

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: kool

GilbertsGurl: any more questions

davepoobond: u ever been to mexico?

GilbertsGurl: no

davepoobond: oh

davepoobond: you should go sometime

davepoobond: if you go to a resort, ask for tom johnson

davepoobond: i’ll get you a good deal

davepoobond: a punta pescadero resort that is

davepoobond: not just any reort

davepoobond: hah

GilbertsGurl: iwho is that person

davepoobond: …erm…. who?

GilbertsGurl: who is tom johnson

davepoobond: me

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: sorry

davepoobond: youre forgiven

GilbertsGurl: hi

davepoobond: …hi

GilbertsGurl: sorry me bad:-(

davepoobond: mmkay

GilbertsGurl: have a girl friend

davepoobond: nope

davepoobond: will you be my girl froiend

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: want my name

davepoobond: sure

GilbertsGurl: Amy

davepoobond: wow

davepoobond: that got me wet

GilbertsGurl: hy

GilbertsGurl: why

davepoobond: oh

davepoobond: no reason

GilbertsGurl: sorry me bad

davepoobond: i was messin

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: have a bro

davepoobond: …..?

GilbertsGurl: have a brother yes

davepoobond: do i have one?

davepoobond: yes

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: age

davepoobond: i already told you

davepoobond: oooooh

davepoobond: my brother

davepoobond: 15

GilbertsGurl: name plz

davepoobond: david johnson

GilbertsGurl: hair

GilbertsGurl: is he in the room

davepoobond: yep

GilbertsGurl: does he have any questions

davepoobond: no

davepoobond: he hates girls

davepoobond: hes gay

davepoobond: here he is

GilbertsGurl: so hat

GilbertsGurl: sorry me bad πŸ™

GilbertsGurl: so what

davepoobond: hey u stupid girl

davepoobond: this david johnson

GilbertsGurl: i am not stupid boy

davepoobond: ya ur a stupid girl

GilbertsGurl: no boys are stupid

davepoobond: i dont care about that. all i know is that girls are dumb and stupid and i hate them

GilbertsGurl: so i like boys have a boy friend

davepoobond: really.

davepoobond: what’s your boyfriend like

GilbertsGurl: he is not my boyfriend yet

davepoobond: really. interesting.

davepoobond: then what is he

GilbertsGurl: do u have a boyfriend

davepoobond: no, i’m not gay

GilbertsGurl: you are you then

davepoobond: wut are you talking about

GilbertsGurl: who am i talking to

davepoobond: david johnson

GilbertsGurl: your brother said u are

davepoobond: said i was

davepoobond: what

GilbertsGurl: gay

davepoobond: …

davepoobond: i’m not

davepoobond: he is

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: sorry

GilbertsGurl: pic

davepoobond: no

davepoobond: i have one of your mom though

davepoobond: <^>

GilbertsGurl: no way

davepoobond: yes way

davepoobond: that was it

davepoobond: <^>

GilbertsGurl: wired

davepoobond: yes i am wired

GilbertsGurl: ok

davepoobond: ok

davepoobond: i think its time that you go

davepoobond: like sign off

davepoobond: so…….do so

GilbertsGurl: no way david what color is your hair and eyes

davepoobond: blue, and white

GilbertsGurl: hair color

davepoobond: blue

davepoobond: eye color = white

GilbertsGurl: nice kool

GilbertsGurl: in school

davepoobond: no. i dropped out in the 4th grade

davepoobond: i taught myself, while doing drugs, by watching barney

davepoobond: and PBS television

davepoobond: then came BBC

davepoobond: because i moved to Britain

davepoobond: and then BBC France

davepoobond: BBC Malaysia

davepoobond: BBC America

davepoobond: BBC Canada

davepoobond: that damn BBC is all over the place aint it

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: no

davepoobond: ok yes

GilbertsGurl: nice life

GilbertsGurl: have a girlfriend david

davepoobond: of course

davepoobond: her name is Ashley and she has huge tits

davepoobond: bigger than my head

davepoobond: but of course i’ve got a massive dong to keep her happy

GilbertsGurl: ok

davepoobond: its like 8===========================================================> this big

GilbertsGurl: put tom on plz

davepoobond: ok. NO

davepoobond: tom is humping the mattress

GilbertsGurl: lol

GilbertsGurl: i g2g ok tom and david

davepoobond: tom aint here

davepoobond: i told u he’s in bed

davepoobond: humping the living crap outta it

GilbertsGurl: ok

GilbertsGurl: i g2g

davepoobond: k bye

davepoobond: leave already

GilbertsGurl: talk later

davepoobond: ooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkk

GilbertsGurl: ok bye bye

#10289: davepoobond -> FigNewtonCK

davepoobond: hey

FigNewtonCK: hey

FigNewtonCK: who are you?

davepoobond: a whore

davepoobond: who are you

FigNewtonCK: same

davepoobond: ohh so you’re a whore too

FigNewtonCK: where you from “whore”

davepoobond: i dont understand the question

FigNewtonCK: where do you live

davepoobond: uhh what?

davepoobond: hold on, lemme stop snorting crack

davepoobond: ok, what was the question again

FigNewtonCK: pull that dick out of your ass while your at it

FigNewtonCK: where you from

davepoobond: uhh…………i still can’t register it

davepoobond: let me take the needle out of my arm

davepoobond: ok now i know what you’re saying

davepoobond: yes, i do like to swim

FigNewtonCK: wow thats nice

davepoobond: i like to fart

davepoobond: cuz i get anal a lot

FigNewtonCK: hey are you a guy or girl

davepoobond: guy

FigNewtonCK: cuz i’m really fuckin horny right now and if your a guy i’m really in the mood so stop your fucking crack shit

davepoobond: right ok bye

FigNewtonCK: bye baby

FigNewtonCK: cant handle me bitch

FigNewtonCK: haha

davepoobond: sure i can

davepoobond: wanna screw me

FigNewtonCK: i have high standards

davepoobond: what, 2 dollar whores?

FigNewtonCK: how old are you

davepoobond: 24

FigNewtonCK: 87… right i’m blonde

davepoobond: left i am too

FigNewtonCK: well i gotta better people to talk to

FigNewtonCK: later

#10288: Boppie -> davepoobond

Boppie: hey

davepoobond: hi’

Boppie: hi

Boppie: ok

Boppie: cool

davepoobond: yeah it is

Boppie: ok

Boppie: cool

Boppie: good

Boppie: brb

davepoobond: welcome back

Boppie: i back

Boppie: ok

davepoobond: ok

Boppie: ok

davepoobond: ok

Boppie: ok

Boppie: ok

Boppie: cool

Boppie: good

Boppie: =-O

davepoobond: great

Boppie: ok

Boppie: haah

davepoobond: hey that was funny

davepoobond: almost as funny as your mom

davepoobond: AHAHAHA

Boppie: ok

Boppie: cool

davepoobond: yeah yeah sure sure

Boppie: ok

Boppie: good

davepoobond: yes very good