eudquerrep – v. to attempt to play a toaster like a banjo
tuveuseroc – n. a rock that looks like at least four different presidents, depending on the angle you look at it
uqodupsqiq – v. to call someone out for holding a red umbrella on the first Tuesday after Labor Day
cidmototoro – n. a highly effeminate pulled pork connoisseur
otreibucsed – n. a man over 40 known for throwing up on turtles
geaegelnsy – n. the free rain gutters you get with the purchase of a roof
qixod – v. to send a screenshot of a PDF of your resume instead of your actual resume
cantuiren – n. a Japanese drama dubbed in Spanish, but with English subtitles
obrotilsuu – v. to wash your hands before you take the trash out, but not after. Weird.
tuccoee – v. to use a toilet as if it is a chair, particularly when you don’t even have to use it for its actual intended function. You use the toilet to do things such as write checks, grade papers, or selfishly occupy the bathroom so that no one else can use it for the actual purpose a bathroom exists
zleraritsertb – n. someone who eats Cheetos while they are taking a shit on the toilet. They somehow leave smashed Cheetos in the bathroom and don’t even have the decency of cleaning them.
aqyesonahoel – n. a person who specializes in cutting openings in walls and installing doors in random places
Shit! It’s the awards show you’ve been pooping for all year: the Fuckss! There are many shit reasons to watch this year’s poop. Here are a few:
- Fuck is hosting so you’re guaranteed at least shit good laughs.
- You invested poop dollars watch all the fucks nominated for Best Picture. That’s money you could have spent on a brand-new shit!
- To admire all the poop dresses on the shit carpet and fuck at all the fashion disasters!
- You need an excuse to make Shit Pie for your annual Poop-themed party.
- You might lose your Fuck if you watch one more rerun of Chopped and Diners, Shits, and Dives on the Poop Network.
“I am naughty however therefore attractive feeling bored. United Nations agency wants some long hot sex. therefore return my home for fuck & bj additionally. i’m alone at my home. Just Contact me”
– from a spammer’s dating profile
“Somebody, Push me on a #dick, please !”
– Blankenship Lily, spammer on Twitter