- Squacklecast Episode 1 – “Episode 468″
- Squacklecast Episode 2 – “We Planned This Out”
- Squacklecast Episode 3 – “Live at Roscoe’s!!!”
- Squacklecast Episode 4 – “DJ Honey, Drop It!”
- Squacklecast Episode 5 – “We’re Back! An Avenger’s Story”
- Squacklecast Episode 6 – “Mermaid Off the Port Bow!”
- Squacklecast Episode 7 – “FUCK the Strawberry Festival!”
- Squacklecast Episode 8 – “Wait Till We Do a Number 9″
- Squacklecast Episode 9 – “We Make Them Only to Kill Them”
- Squacklecast Episode 10 – “The Art of Covering Shifts”
- Squacklecast Episode 11 – “Team Cruise vs. Team Jesus”
- Squacklecast Episode 12 – “It’s Not a Car. It’s a Squacklecast.”
- Squacklecast Episode 13 – “About the Olympics or Something”
- Squacklecast Episode 14 – “An Eternity of Dog Food Commercials”
- Squacklecast Episode 15 – “Crappy Movies Under the Stars”
Summer movies are in full swing, and this time we take a look at Prometheus as well as the upcoming summer schedule of movies. Its a big year for super heroes but not much else to get excited about.
WARNING: THERE ARE SOME PROMETHEUS SPOILERS! You can skip to about a third of the way through and skip all the Prometheus stuff if you care.
Prometheus is a film that raises more questions than answers, like: “Why would you kill Charlize Theron?” and “Why didn’t we see that scene with Charlize getting it up the butt from the big black dude?”
And there’s also all that hullabaloo about the origins of man and the beginnings of the Xenomorphs, but that’s all secondary.
Inception noise? Meet your match: PROMETHEUS NOISE!
Adam Sandler is intentionally making shitty movies. Its the only explanation. He just needs to stick with family comedies and dramatic movies, apparently.
This summer has a list of movies it wants to murder, and its gotten a few of them already:
The Dictator: Assassinated
Dark Shadows: Black Eye
Chernobyl Diaries: Nuked
Prometheus: Hospitalized (In the baby ward)
That’s My Boy: Murdered
Rock of Ages: Murdered
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter: Pending Assassination
Brave is another one of those Pixar movies that I’ll probably just hate. I hate more Pixar movies than I do like them, apparently.
Owen Wilson: I don’t like his voice, and I don’t like his face.
Finding Nemo had the worst characters of any Pixar movie ever.
Its actually worse than that. It has Lil’ Wayne in it.
Directed by Steven Soderbergh, no less.
How does Tyler Perry keep making movies? He’s like Adam Sandler but successful.
Katy Perry: Part of Me: Pending Stage Collapse
Savages: Dead on Arrival
Step Up Revolution: Someone Will Step Down (In the government. Get it? Revolution? Government? Step Down?)
The Watch: Legally murdered. Maybe.
Total Recall: Unfortunate Death Due to Lack of References. Please resubmit an application.
Expendables 2: Expendable (get it?)
ParaNorman: Already Dead
Resident Evil: Retribution: Been Dead
That’s it for this week, folks. Hope you like our rudimentary coverage of what’s to come for this summer in the movies.
If you want to be on the Squacklecast, let us know! We can schedule you for an interview and you can hang out with us for an hour.
Tags: A DPB Tag, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, battleship, Chernobyl Diaries, Dark Shadows, Expendables, Finding Nemo, Inception, Magic Mike, Prometheus, Resident Evil: Retribution, Rock of Ages, Step Up Revolution, That's My Boy, The Dictator, The Good Dinosaur, The Good Shepherd, Total Recall
Tagged People: Abraham Lincoln, Adam Sandler, Channing Tatum, Charlize Theron, davepoobond, Disney, Katy Perry, Lil' Wayne, Owen Wilson, Pixar, Sean Bean, Solid Billy, Steven Soderbergh, Tyler Perry